Spirited Away
by KittyCatKate
Summary: Madison just wanted to write at an unhealthy hour of night. Not be taken out of her bed, thrown into another world, and face life or death situations just because a powerful entity known as Truth was 'bored'. With her memories taken of later events, Madison now has to help two people who she thought was fiction if she wants to survive and return home EdwardXOC
1. Chapter 1: A Horrible Wake up Call

**DISCLAIMER: I do not, nor will ever own Fullmetal Alchemist. I don't even own the main character!**

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 **First Published: August 29, 2016**

 **Re-written: March 28, 2018**

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Son of a fried biscuit.

Why couldn't my brain just cooperate? For once in it's life?

Scowling, I glared at the bright white screen of my ipod, probably blinding my eyes long term as it mocked me with the words, ' _0 word count, please input text._ ' I was trying, dammit!

Sighing, I dug my hand into the salt and vinegar chip bag that was seated beside me and stuffed a handful of chips into my mouth, hoping that somehow the acidic tingling would give me some inspiration.

5 minutes later, nothing, nada, zilch. I groaned in disappointment, wishing my best friend Kate was up to give me a prompt or something. Sighing, I scrolled through our last conversation and reading the moment where she had fallen asleep. If only she didn't have such a need for sleep and stayed up with me.

"Ugh, screw it," I sighed, throwing the nearly destroyed pink case onto my bed, sighing once it bounced off the sheets and onto the floor, making me groan in annoyance, "I don't wanna get _up_!"

Instead, I pulled my warm covers over my red headed hair and flopped over onto my side, ignoring the ipod on the floor. "I'll get you tomorrow!" I yelled at the in-animate object, despite the fact that it couldn't hear me. I rolled my eyes at my laziness once I realized I wouldn't be able to listen to music falling asleep since my ipod was still resting on the floor and having a party with my pet rock, Charles. But I was too far gone in my stubbornness to honestly give a damn.

My eyes snapped open, however, once my ears caught the slightest, _'Whoosh,_ ' sound.

I'm quite sure I hadn't gotten up, nor had I put my headphones in, and it certainly wasn't the TARDIS or my family since they always fell asleep two hours before I do. So that left only one logical conclusion.

There was a burglar in the house and he was coming to shank me in my sleep.

Trying to control my breathing and quickly beating heart, I had a never ending staring contest with the wall as I faced away from the door, too scared to move. I was crying internally, wishing I hadn't been lazy and had my ipod so I could text Kate, or Lex, or someone because _I needed emotional support, dammit!_

A gasp caught in my throat when the wall was brightened by a sudden blaze of light. I knew it wasn't my light, since the room would be covered in it, so where was it coming from? Curiosity taking over fear, I turned my head.

I immediately screamed.

A large, bright freaking _eye_ was staring up at me from the floor, the pupil small and looking straight into my soul. I'm shocked I didn't wake the whole neighborhood from my petrified screaming as I scrambled up into my wall, as far away from the eye as I could because _there was a freaking eye on my floor what the absolute fuck._ My dilated pupils were lightened by the eye's own, my hair whipping and slapping my face from the wind that was being generated.

I screamed again as the eye narrowed, and I could have sworn it was glaring at me, until large, black arms began to rise from it. I shook, screaming and backing up uselessly as they slowly inched further and further towards me, knocking over my books and nick-knacks, exploring and destroying my room in the process.

My eyes widened farthest in fear as the hands finally began to inch toward me. I couldn't run, I couldn't fight, I couldn't do anything besides scramble back in a flurry of limbs, my screams and yells echoing wildly in my ears as I grabbed my bed's headrest when one of the hands connected to my ankle, cold as ice and sending a shock through my veins.

"No, please!" Holding on with all my might, more and more of the hands grabbed hold of me. Their grip was tight, and as they pulled me away, it wasn't long until I was yanked back. "Let me go, let me go! Get off me!" Screaming, I tried and tried to hold onto anything in my path, my wall, my bed, the cabinets, the _floor_ , but it wasn't enough.

"Mom?! Dad?! _Siera?_!" I called out, hoping my family would just rush in and save me. I didn't want this, I didn't want to die by some freaking eye.

My screams bounced off the walls, but no one came.

"No...!" I could only watch uselessly as my limbs slowly crumbled before my eyes, as I was yanked into the eye.

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Where... where was I?

"What... happened? I don't..." Muttering to myself, I took in the sudden white nothingness faced before me. It stretched on for eons, never ending, it seemed.

" _Hello, Madison Sloane."_ Gasping, I whirled around.

I was faced with the white silhouette of a human, casually seated in front of the large gate behind it. The large grin on it's face chilled me to the bone. I knew what it was, but somehow, I felt inferior, powerless when faced with it.

"How-how do you know my name?" I stuttered cautiously, backing up from the suffocating aura it seemed to give off.

It smiled, chuckling. _"Oh, I know many things. But I am sure you already know that,_ " it spoke, standing up to face me. I was at height with it now, faced with my own shadow.

"You... You're the T-Truth," I choked out, hands covering my mouth to stop the panting breaths that escaped.

" _You are correct,"_ it appraised, giving one small clap to my answer. Grinning wildly, it added, " _One name you have for me is the world, or perhaps the universe, maybe even God, but you know me as the Truth."_ The chilling words seemed so awing and familiar I couldn't help but stumble backwards, faced with the reality of them being spoken. _"I am all, I am one, so of course, this all means, I am you."_

"No, no, this isn't possible," I rebutted, shaking my head as I cried hysterically. "This can't be real, you can't be real! I ate way too much sugar and this is all the result of a sugar induced dream because _this isn't real!"_

 _"And yet here you are,_ " Truth replied, grinning wider if it could even go that far. I could sense the amusement.

"This has to be fake," I sobbed, hands sliding down my face. "Because I'm going to wake up any time now with my mom yelling at me, and I'll realize this was all a dream because you're _just a fictional character!_ "

 _"Do you truly believe that?_ " Truth asked, causing me to bite my lip. It certainly _felt_ real.

"Fine," I sighed, throwing my hands in the air. "Humor me. If this is real, why am I here?"

 _"That would be my doing,"_ it said, shrugging. _"I brought you here._ "

"But why?" I demanded. "What does this have to do with me?"

 _"Being who I am... entertainment does not come easily. I have selected many... champions, you might say. However, I felt that they all lacked a certain... spark."_ Grinning, Truth inched closer to me as I backed up, nearly stumbling over my feet. _"Until, that is, I found you."_

I was shaking. Arms squeezing my mid-section, I gulped in air like a life-line, trying not to throw up. "What..." licking my dry lips, I tried again, "What are you going to do to me?"

 _"Well, Madison Sloane,"_ Truth said. _"You must know of Amestris. This land has always intrigued me. And as my champion, I have decided that seeing how you might cope in my chosen land will be enough entertainment."_

I must have been in shock, because the words only made me laugh. "What? No, you're joking. But..." Eyes widening, I looked up at the gate, realization taking over.

 _"You must have realized by now that a toll must be taken to pass,_ " Truth laughed, throwing its head back and ignoring my dawning horror. _"Worry not, Champion. I will not take a limb, merely,"_ it's smirk stole the breath from my body, _"your memories. You will be unaware of future events. Your experience will be all the more frightening if you will not have prior warning."_

It stepped to the side as a large grinding noise echoed throughout the empty space. I stared up at the opening gate in silent horror, and it was only when the arms began to reach towards me did I scream and begin stumbling backwards away from it.

I couldn't run for long, and all too soon did an arm snatch at my ankle again. I slipped, falling and letting out a yelp as my nose made a sickening _crack!_ Groaning at the pain, I could only struggle helplessly as the arms grabbed over every inch of my body. I couldn't do anything against them as I was dragged towards my impending doom.

 _"We will meet again, Champion,"_ Truth said eerily, grinning at my dragging body. I tried to hold onto the ground, tried to fight back and dig my nails into the ground, but the arms were simply too strong. The last thing I saw was Truth's sinister grin before I was succumbed to the cold and chilling darkness.

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 **AN: Hmm... I'm not really sure what I was thinking as a wrote this.**

 **This started out as a joke between me and my friend (Madison). We were wondering what would happen and what kind of conversations she would have with the characters and, well... it turned into this.**

 **I'm going to try and write as much as I can, however I can't promise anything.**

 **Some thing to know before we continue: I am re-writing older chapters, so keep that in mind as you keep reading. Madison is currently 14 as of the first chapter, so right now. I know my writing isn't the best and may be too fast-paced or bland so please let me know if you find any mistakes!**

 **Let me know if there's anything else you need! Until then!**

 **-Adios!**


	2. Chapter 2: Existential Crisis

**DISCLAIMER: No, I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist**

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Okay, either I fell asleep on the ground, or I had been kidnapped and was bound on the hardest cement known to man.

Because my back was _killing_ me.

However, there was a small whirring sound and a distinct chatter of people whispering. Furrowing my eyebrows, I tried to listening carefully to the conversations.

" _Did you seriously forget your bag?!_ " Okay, that was one man.

" _I'm sorry man, it slipped my mind!_ " That was the other.

" _I'm so excited to see Papa!_ " That was a little girl, probably around the age of 7.

"I _know dear, we'll be there soon._ " That was probably the mother.

Okay, from the conversations, I could tell that I hadn't been kidnapped, and I hadn't fallen asleep on the ground. It seemed people were heading somewhere, so this was obviously a form of transportation. So I has either on a bus, or a train. Or... oh god, please, not a plane!

But... How did I get here? The last thing I remember was writing in my room...

Holy crab cakes.

Oh God, that thing with Truth, I suddenly remembered. The fear, the cold, the darkness, the downright _wrongness_... Did that truly happen...?

Psh, of course not. Because _Truth_ was a fictional character, and I _definitely_ wasn't some Mary-Sue OC that would be thrown into an alternate dimension of one of her favorite anime's. I wasn't a good runner, I couldn't fight for the life of me, and, to be honest, I wasn't as brave as I make myself out to be.

So no, I wasn't in Amestris, and I definitely wasn't going on adventures with Edward and Alphonse Elric, and this was all some really messed up dream from all the sugar I probably shouldn't have been eating on a school night.

However, the sudden small finger poking my cheek definitely seemed pretty real.

"Come on, dear. Stop terrorizing the poor girl," a motherly voice chided in front of me.

"But mama, she looks dead! Are you sure she's not dead?" another voice piped from beside me, probably the culprit of my immense annoyance and discomfort.

I decided to open my eyes, and boy, was that a bad decision.

"Holy crap, I've been blinded!" I exclaimed, quickly slapping my face with my hands to cover my eyes. I groaned in slight pain of the sudden light difference, and I heard the little girl and her mother chuckling.

"You were out for a long time, dear," the woman said, and I saw her smile as my eyes began to adjust to the lighting. "You were already asleep by the time we took our seats."

"Well, uh, what can I say?" I said nervously, with a very unconvincing laugh. "I'm a heavy sleeper!"

The woman seemed to have bought it, as she chuckled with me, her long brown hair shaping her motherly features. "It appears you are!" I couldn't hep the smile come to my face as she said that. "I'm Angelica, you are?"

"I'm Madison!" I said, smiling as I shook her offered hand.

"I'm Celia!" The little red haired girl piped up, giving me a huge grin with a missing front tooth.

I smiled again. "Its nice to meet the both of you!" I said, and Angelica nodded while Celia grinned.

"Likewise," Angelica said, and with a smile and a nod, I turned to look out the window, (also making me notice that we were on a train.)

Okay... so, I was in Amestris. Most likel- no, _in_ a dream world. Truth said that he (she? It?) wanted me as entertainment. Okay, well, the most exciting things only would happen with main characters and at main plot points. All I needed to do was avoid any characters or places and I could live a safe life. Only until I woke up, that is. So, recheck. Avoid main characters? Check, (no matter how tempting it may be). Avoid any main areas or places? Check. Find out time period? I'll get to that. Find out a good place to stay? Also in the process in planning. This would be a piece of cherry filled cake!

"Mama, that man is funny," Celia blurted as she took a seat beside me, swinging her legs back and forth.

Angelica frowned. "Celia, dear, you shouldn't say things like that!" I raised an eyebrow in curiosity.

"What do you mean by funny?" I asked. Because, either she meant my definition of funny, as completely crazy, or funny as in, well... funny. And honestly, I was kinda curious.

Celia's eyes lit with mirth and amusement. "Well, he must really love armor to be wearing it everywhere! That's really funny!" she laughed, grinning.

Oh, _come on_! Truth, you little bugger!

Of _course_ Truth threw me in a seat right behind the two most important characters! Truth could kiss my foot if he thought I was going to interact with them!

... As tempting as it sounded.

No! Bad Madison! Stop it!

I took a deep breath to calm myself, but almost choked on said air when a braided, blond haired boy stood up behind Angelica.

His golden eyes searched around the train cart with a frown, but he was met with judging looks from the rest of the passengers, (I only just noticed the large suit of armor behind him.)

He gave a false grin, and chuckled nervously. "Ah! Nothing to see here, folks! Nothing at all!" He then sat back down quickly, the suit of armor seemingly looking down in a depressed manner.

I let out a long sigh, slouching down into my rather uncomfortable seat, running a hand down my face. Okay, so I just saw two main characters of a famous anime, wonderful. Existential crisis overload.

Celia began to tug on my sleeve, (I noticed I was in a T-shirt and jeans, how nice of Truth). I looked at her curiously, and she gave me a large grin. "C'mon," she whispered, and tugged me forward to the other seat, despite my yelping in protest. She then poked her head over the side, taking me with her.

Celia than began to wave at the two boys sitting there, and they looked at her in surprise. They turned to me, and I quickly gave them a smile. And honestly, it wasn't very forced.

 _I was sitting in front of Edward and Alphonse Elric._ Let me be happy. Screw not interacting with them.

"See, Al. They're not scared of you!" Edward said, smiling at his brother. Alphonse let out a small chuckle of relief, and Edward turned to look back at us with smiles. I wanted to duck my head in embarrassment.

Celia made a small sound of curiosity, and I noticed she was looking at Edward's arm. His automail one, and let me tell you, it looked _so_ cool in person. Or, dreamworld, or whatever...

Edward took a small second to let a troubled expression appear on his face, making me frown, before he smirked at us, pushing back his sleeve and revealing more of the automail arm. "Way cooler than skin, huh?"

We both nodded. "Definitely," I said, giving him a grin. Oh god, I was screaming and fangirling on the inside, though.

Angelica turned around, and smiled at her daughter. "Now, now, dear. You've troubled them enough," she said, placing a hand on Celia's head and chuckling, smiling at the two brothers. They smiled back, and the two sat back down.

"What are you doing in Central?" Alphonse asked, and I looked back at him while blinking, realizing he was talking to me.

I chuckled, rubbing the back of my head. "Well... uh, stuff." They looked at me curiously, and I decided to change the subject before they began to ask. "Mind if I sit with you?"  
They looked at each other in surprise, before Alphonse seemed to pipe up in enthusiasm. "Sure!" I smiled, although I was a little sad to realize that they'd expected me to be too weird-ed out to want anything else to do with them.

I quickly left my seat with Angelica and Celia, making sure to wave to them, before making my way to Edward and Alphonse. They smiled as I sat down, beside the eldest brother.

"What's your name?" Alphonse asked cheerfully.

I smiled. "Name's Madison! You two?"

Edward pointed a thumb at his chest, smirking. "I'm Edward."

"I'm Alphonse!" the younger brother piped up.

"So... what are you two doing central?" I asked, although I already knew.

Edward smirked, and answered, "Stuff." I was speechless, before puffing my cheeks in irritation as I realized he used my own words.

"Sneaky," I said, and he grinned, Alphonse chuckling, the sound echoing from his armor.

There was small conversation between us, although, between us would be more by Alphonse and I, as Edward had fallen asleep beside me on his back.

"So, really, Madison, what are you doing in central?" Alphonse, and I hesitated.

I couldn't really just tell him, 'Oh yeah, you're a fictional character in an alternate world I live in and the being Truth who took your body sent me here.' That wouldn't go over well. And I definitely wasn't going with the cliche route, 'Oh, I can't remember anything.' Nu uh.

... But, I didn't really have anything else to say. I didn't have an identity here, no family, no friends, so...

I wanted to hit myself with a hammer, but I said, "Promise not to tell anyone?" Alphonse was the most caring person, like, _ever_ , so I like, 99.9 percent sure I could trust him with this.

Alphonse nodded enthusiastically, and leaned forward eagerly. I took a deep breath, and said, "I can't remember why I'm on this train."

God, it was _so_ clichè.

Alphonse gasped in surprise. "You mean, you don't remember anything?"

I shook my head. "I remember small things, like friends and family, but I can't remember where I live or how I got here."

Alphonse looked like he would be frowning if he could. "So... you're all alone..."

I frowned uncomfortably and sadly. "I guess so..."

There was a tense silence, and it was making me uncomfortable and itchy. Until Alphonse suddenly blurted, "You could come with us!"

I blinked in surprise. "Seriously? A complete stranger?" A huge grin split my face.

Ooh, Taylor, Lex and Kate would be _so_ jealous.

The boy nodded his head enthusiastically. "Yeah! You seem really nice, and I would feel really guilty if we left you all alone! Besides, taking care of brother can get tiresome sometimes."

"Wow, Alphonse, that means a lot!" I said, smiling largely, and he chuckled happily.

There was another moment of silence, but we didn't seem to mind. I was looking out the window, watching the trains reflection in the water we were driving past. Okay, I know this was an episode earlier in the original series, so what happened next...?

Wait.

Wha-... Why can't I remember what was happening?! I couldn't remember how this episode would play out, I couldn't remember future episodes! Why?!

Wait a second, didn't Truth say he was going to take memories of future events?! Was this what he meant? But... I could remember certain things, like all the characters, places, and even the ending... But I can't remember who dies and who lives.

This was completely unfair! I couldn't know how to protect people and warn others! I wouldn't know what was dangerous and how to avoid them! I wouldn't know how to survive!

"Madison? Are you okay? You look a little pale," Alphonse asked, bringing me out of my reverie. I took a deep breath, and smiled at him.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said, and even though he didn't seem convinced, he didn't question it.

Suddenly, there was a flurry of footsteps coming behind us. Alphonse and I watched as a man approached us, and stood at our seat.

This was... Havoc...? Falman...? I think it was Falman.

"Colonel was right... The one traveling with him is a pipsqueak!" he said, looking at Edward.

Edward's eyes shot open, and he immediately jumped up. " _You are you calling a pipsqueak so small you could step on?!"_ He exclaimed loudly, glaring heatedly at the soldier. I was trying not to laugh, because, _damn_ , his rants were way funnier in person.

Falman backed up in defense. "Hey, I didn't mean anything by it, I only-" he suddenly cut off his sentence, pointing a gun at a man who had done the same, although I don't think he noticed the one behind him, as he was struck with the barrel of the gun, successfully being knocked out.

I sucked in a deep, rather scared breath as the thugs glared at all of the standing passengers. "No heroics today, folks. Put your hands over you're head or I'll put a bullet in it instead."

With wide eyes and shaking hands, I did just that. I turned to looked at the two brothers, and I gave them a nervous look.

This didn't as fun anymore.

* * *

 **AN: Here's another chapter! Wow, hasn't been over 3 months... Awesome!**

 **I've been sick these past few days, and I randomly got motivation to write this, so lucky for you, folks!**

 **I wanted to thank each and every one of you for reviewing, adding it to favorites and following this. It makes me so happy, you have no idea how much it means with all of your support.**

 **If you have any questions, don't be afraid to ask. I'll be happy to answer!**

 **That's all for now, so, until next time!**

 **-Adios!**


	3. Chapter 3: Train Escapades

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own FMA, blah, blah, blah. However, I do own Madison! :D**

 **Madison: Um, excuse me?!**

 **Kate: *Nervously sweats***

 **Madison: Slavery was abolished! I can and will hit you hit a wad of paper until you beg for mercy!**

 **Kate: *Gulps***

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Okay, I feel like this is gunna start to get old real fast. Because once again, some part of my body hurt. The blood circulation in my arms was completely gone, leaving them sore and numb.

We'd been standing there for 10-15 minutes now, and I wanted to cut my arms off. The thugs were slowly and carefully checking each and every person from head to toe. They made it halfway across the car, but one of them seemed to keep glancing at our direction; more specifically Alphonse's direction.

It seemed the thug finally made up his mind, nudging the other and nodding at Alphonse. It looked like they were having a silent conversation, before they began to make their way over to us, their guns held out in front of them.

Cold sweat was trickling my eyebrow, and I gulped. "Guys...?" I whispered apprehensively, glancing at the two brothers with wide eyes.

Edward gave me a reassuring grin. "Don't worry, it'll fine." He seemed confident, but that didn't mean I was. However, I decided to trust his judgment. Worst case scenario, I'll wake up from this dream.

The thugs eventually stood in front of us, but their focus was more on Alphonse than Edward or me. "Helmet. Off," one of them growled, glaring heatedly at the suit of armor.

The two brothers gasped, and I made a split second decision.

"Oh my God! What is that?!" I exclaimed fearfully, pointing behind the two thugs with wide, scared eyes. The thugs spun around, looking for who I had been freaking out about.

They didn't have to worry. Edward had kicked one of them with his leg, his auto-mail one, while Alphonse hit the other on his head. Harshly. They both fell to the floor in a heap, and the two alchemist grinned at each other, even sending me grateful looks too.

"You stupid kids!" one of the passengers exclaimed, making us turn in his direction. I was gunna tell him off, before I saw his fearful, scared expression. "What if their buddies notice them gone? They'll retaliate and kill us all!"

Murmurs and nods of agreement rang throughout the cabin. I fidgeted under all the attention, that was more than negative. I was never good under all the spotlight, if the nervous wreck I always turned into during speeches vouched for.

With all the commotion and scared mutters from passengers, none of us seemed to notice that one of the thugs had arisen. Before we could tell what was happening, he pulled a gun on the little girl, Celia. She gasped in fear, and for a split second, I felt my heart skip a painful, agonizing beat.

Thankfully, Edward had a better reflexes than I did, and he kicked the guy in the head, the thug passing out with a thud on the floor. I felt a large sigh of relief escape me, and Edward knelt before the scared little Celia.

"No need to worry; your big brothers and sister will take care of it," he said, ruffling her hair with a smile. Celia smiled nervously, hugging her mom's skirt tighter. Honestly, it was kinda cute- wait.

Holy burnt oranges, did he include _me_ in that sentence?!

It seemed he did, as he sent me a small, short smile before standing up. Oh god, I was just included in the schemes with a main character, _by_ a main character. Dammit! Isn't that breaking some sort of Mary-Sue law, don't get involved with the the plot?!

Eh... I was already in too deep, might as well go all the way.

"Hey! You three, over here!"

Was it just me, or was I just visited my Jiminey Cricket?

Okay- it wasn't the weird conscience insect. It was actually the man we met earlier, Falman, who was all tied up thanks to the thugs. After releasing him from his bindings, he sighed, rubbing at his rope-burned, red wrists.

"How shameful. I can't believe I was one-upped by some petty thugs." He glanced at the three of us, sizing us up. "And who are you three? Freelancers?"

Edward chuckled. "Just some old-fashioned alchemists."

I perked up. "And I'm along for the ride!"

The man smiled. "I see. Well, I'm Falman, State Warent Officer."

Edward frowned. "Military? You don't look like it."

Falman gestured his head up the the front of the car. "Special guest on board. Wouldn't do to be recognized so easily, but I suppose it was still all for naught."

"No wonder thugs attacked the train," Alphonse muttered, his voice echoing as he tried to keep his voice quiet.

"And unfortunately, they brought down the passengers with them," Edward stated, scowling at the floor as he crossed his arms. He shook his head and glanced up at Alphonse. "Al, I'm gunna go up top to surprise 'em. You go with Falman from below." Al nodded his head in affirmation.

Suddenly, to my surprise, Ed turned to me. "You've seemed to wanna help, so what are you gunna do?" I avoided his gaze, awkwardly cracking my hands (it was a pretty disgusting habit, as I've been told many times).

I can't believe he was including me in these plans. I had nothing to contribute to them, I was practically dead weight. I wasn't an alchemist, I wasn't in the military like Falman, and I didn't have any special skills that could be of any use.

However... the small, very small part of me was screaming and and giggling like a school girl. I had the chance to work with one of my favorite fictional characters, and I was going to say no to that? Nu-uh.

So, instead of listening to my logic, I gave the blond haired boy a surprisingly confident smile and said, "I think I'll lend you an extra hand."

He smirked at me (I think a part of me just died inside). "Try to keep up."

He led me outside the car to where it connected with another. He gestured to a ladder, before beginning to climb it. I swallowed my nerves and began to climb it as well. Ed grabbed my hand to help steady me when I reached the top, which was a lot more shaky and unsteady than I had anticipated. "C'mon," Edward shouted over the wind, and I had to sputter out some hair that landed in my mouth. Eew...

I focused on walking one step at a time, not bothering to be quick about it. It was hard enough as it was with the shaky movement of the train under my feet, and the wind slapping against my skin. I wasn't gunna rush myself and end up a splat on the side of the mountain.

"You okay, Madison?!" Edward shouted over the wind again, quite a while in front of me.

I somehow gained the courage to look up at him. "Yeah! Just taking it a little slow!" I could see him nod, sending me a thumbs up, and I smiled a little. That is, before I saw a large tree branch in front of him. "Ed, look out!" I yelled in alarm, eyes widening.

He wasn't able to duck quick enough, and the branch crashed into his abdomen, sending him flying.

"Ed!" Crap! He couldn't die, he was the _main character,_ he just couldn't!

He flew past me and over the edge, and before I could think about it I snatched out my hand and grabbed his, his weight pulling me down.

"Oh- God," I wheezed in strain, my arm stinging as if it had been pulled by it's socket. I grabbed onto Edward's arm with my other, balancing myself with my feet on the train. "Would it kill you to lose a few pounds?"

Edward didn't reply. He let out a large, shaky breath from his mouth. "Yeah," he squeaked in fear. He looked back up at me with a shocked looked. "Thanks for the save. Would've been a pancake if it weren't for you."

I attempted a smile, but it was more of a grimace. "Don't mention it."

"Can you pull me up now?"

I scowled. "Yes, your highness."

As I began to pull the elder brother up, with him also assisting by slowly climbing up the side of the train made a sudden lurch, lurching as it changed course.

I suddenly lost my grip on the train, and the sensation of floating assaulted my senses. I screamed in fear, Edward's own scream filling my ears. There was only one thought on my mind.

We were going to die. _I_ was going to die.

I clenched my eyes tightly, holding back tears. _I don't want to die!_

The collar of my shirt was was wrenched back, nearly choking me at the sudden movement. I panted, holding tightly onto Edward's hand, even though he was somehow safely on the ground.

"Whoa there! That was too close for comfort, eh?"

Tensely, I turned to face our savior, who had a steady grip on my arm. He was on older man, who was smiling gently at me, with a goatee and black hair whipping to and fro from the wind.

This was Meas Hughes.

"You alright?" he asked me, before looking down at Edward.

Ed groaned, but was able to sit up. "Yeah. Could'a done without the fall, though." He rubbed at his head, before looking at our still intertwined hands. "Madison, you can let go of me now. I'm not dangling over the side of a train anymore."

I let out a shaky breath. "Y'never know, anything could happen and you'll fly off again," I replied quietly, but nonetheless let go.

"I'm surprised you two kids made it out this far. You're lucky I happened to catch you, but you may not be the next time," Hughes said sternly, fixing us with a harsh stare. I gulped back a lump in my throat, avoiding his gaze. He was right, I almost _died_. Hughes let out a chuckle, breaking the suddenly tense atmosphere. "Forgot to mention; I'm Major Meas Hughes. And..." he glanced at Ed, "you're Edward Elric, isn't that right?"

Ed blinked in surprise. "Um, yeah, that's me."

Hughes smiled. "Mustang mentioned you; I'm an old friend of his. Although," he turned his attention to me, and I tensed under his eyes, "he never told me about you."

I smiled nervously. "I'm no one important. Just happened to be along for the ride." I shook my head, fixing my smile to a more kind one. "I'm Madison." Hughes smiled back at me.

"Wait- Lieutenant Colonel?" Edward asked in surprise. Hughes nodded, before gesturing back to the top of the train.

"C'mon. If we wanna stop those terrorists, we'll have to work as a team."

Edward began to climb after Hughes, before stopping and looking at me. "You coming?"

I swallowed my nerves. "Yeah."

It was once again a long, challenging walk along the train. Thankfully, Hughes showed the two of us how to keep our balance, but with my tiny, small mass, if was still difficult just getting a proper grip.

Miraculously, we were able to reach the front of the train. Hughes explained his plan to us, which was that Edward and him were going to sneak up on the thugs forcing the conductors to continue the train on track. I was supposed to stay on top in case they needed any backup, (which, if I was being honest with myself, I sincerely hoped they didn't).

They sudden realism of the situation earlier made me scared. Really, properly scared. I nearly _died_ , and I almost brought down Edward with me. It made me realize... this wasn't a dream. Truth had really thrown me here, _trapped_ me here. I was just a source of entertainment for it, some sort of play-thing. And it terrified me.

I stayed near the tender, my feet buried in the coal to keep my balance. It smelled horrible, but I bore through it. In front where the engine was, I heard some shouting, along with thumps that sounded an awful lot like fighting, but I didn't dare leave my little safe haven.

Turns out, it wasn't as safe as I expected. My ears caught a sudden, "Madison, duck!" I complied without a thought, which I was very lucky I did, because the tell-tale sound of gun-fire echoed out, and bullets whizzing above me.

I let out a shaky breath. _That was too close for comfort... again..._

The height of the tender of coal was quite a bit less than the cars of the train, so if I stayed exactly as I were, face pressed up against the terrible smelling, skin griming coal, and the thug didn't climb over to me, I'd be safe.

A bright light unexpectedly obscured my vision for nearly two seconds, and I realized, with a blink that Edward had transmuted something and was now climbing back onto the cars.

A childish glee rose in my chest. I just witnessed alchemy! True, deconstructing and reconstructing, alchemy! Hmm... if I was going to be here awhile, maybe I could pick up an alchemy book...

There was a loud bang, a shout of alarm, until it went somewhat quiet. Then Edward's yell echoed over the wind, "It's safe now!"

I popped my head over the cart, and, indeed, only Edward was in sight. He sat beside a large canon, and I realized that must have been what he transmuted. A large grin broke across my face. "That was so cool!" I shouted in glee.

Edward smirked, opening his mouth to reply, when one of the conductors began to yell at him. "Hey! Don't mess around with the tender; that's the life of this train!"

"Oh, uh, sorry!" Ed shouted back, before putting on a thinking face. "Box of tender," he muttered to himself. I waited a few seconds for him to say something, before he suddenly cackled with a devilish grin.

"Why do I feel like you're about to inflict some pain on a lot of people...?" I asked hesitantly, giving him skeptical look. He only grinned larger.

"Hey, Hughes, c'mere!"

Hughes had climbed up to where we were, and Edward told us his plan. It was actually pretty ingenious, and to be honest, quite hilarious.

"Madison, right before I send the water into the cart, you're gunna go into where the passengers are, to make sure the water doesn't hurt them, okay?" Edward said, looking at me.

I blinked. "You want _me_ to do that?" I asked incredulously.

He raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, that's why I'm asking you."

"I can take your place if you want, Madison," Hughes piped in. I gulped.

I honestly wasn't sure. I had been pretty useless thus far, but that's why I wanted to help. I didn't want to be useless. I didn't want to be a burden. By now, I was absolutely certain that this wasn't a dream. And that terrified me. My hands haven't stopped shaking, and I'm quite I was just running on adrenalin right now. But if Truth wanted me to play some god-forsaken game for it's enjoyment, then I'd sure as hell play to win.

"No, I got it. You can count on me," I replied, smirking with more confidence than I'd ever had.

"Well, we'd better get started then."

Hughes and I climbed onto the cart where the leader and the General's family was. I vaguely heard Edward giving a little speech into this microphone thing he had transmuted, but I was more focused on getting into the cart, which Hughes helped with.

He was able to lower my tiny, munchkin self down to the window. It took my frantically waving my legs to get a grip to actually enter, but somehow, with immense difficulty, I was able to jump into the booth without falling or making too much noise.

"... hold onto your seats! And get ready for some turbulence!"

Quickly rushing forward, I slammed the door shut, pulling the plank that acted as a sort of lock down. In the nick of time too, because as soon as I backed up, there was shouting and the unmistakable sound of rushing water.

The door creaked with the sudden weight, and I crossed my fingers and prayed to whatever deity (not Truth) listening that it would hold.

Some water began filled up the tiny cabin from the crack in the door. I gulped, nervous sweat tickling my neck, chanting, "C'mon, c'mon, c'mon!" under my breath. "Anytime now, Ed."

Before long, the water began to recede. I let out a breath of relief, watching as the water disappeared from the other side by the window on the door. I turned to the family behind me, giving them a shaky, broken smile. "You guys okay?"

The older woman nodded hesitantly, holding tightly onto the younger children she was hugging close to her body, while the man I assumed was the General gave me a tense nod.

All of a sudden, there was a loud, continuous gunshot. I ducked on instinct, my heart echoing in my ears.

"I don't think so!"

Edward?

I cautiously peeked out of the small window, quietly gasping as I saw Ed holding back a much taller, bulky man. He was gritting his teeth in strain, his legs shaking underneath him. He looked like he could be crushed like a cheerio.

They were speaking something, but I could barely hear them, it was all just a garbled mess.

Ed was beginning to lose his grip on the ground. Something had to be done, _fast_ , or he was going to be trampled.

But I was the only one right now. What could I do? I was just a tiny, scared hermit who could barely lift anything heavier than 10 pounds. What could someone who could be frightened by their own shadow on more than one occasion?

Not much, that was certain.

 _Not much, but still something._

Swallowing my frenzied nerves, and somehow moving my stiff, awkward stubby legs, I ran out of the tiny cabin, and with a rather pathetic shout, I swung my leg up with all my might-

 _And kicked the guy right in the jewels._

He let out a tiny, high-pitched strained whine, but it gave Edward just enough leverage to crush the man's auto-mail arm. The guy let out a furious shout, but instead of retaliating against Edward, he whirled around to me.

His angry, nearly black eyes froze me into my spot. I was too stunned to move, my legs disobeying every thought my brain shouted, telling me to _move_ , to get away, find a _place to hide_. _**You're going to die why aren't you moving?!**_

The angry man rose his other arm, and my eyes met with the barrel of a gun. My heart thumped in my ears, the world seeming to slow to a halt as I faced what could be my death.

 _Oh God. This was it. I was going to die. I wouldn't be able to see home again, I wouldn't hug my mother goodnight or cook hot cocoa with my Grandma. I wouldn't make fun of Kate or laugh with her ever again, Oh God I just wanted to go-_

A hand grasped my stomach, tossing me behind the large body connected to the hand that had saved me. They knocked the gun out of the angry man's grasp, and in the next second, he was tossed to the ground by a massive punch.

It took a few seconds to regain my breath, and I shakily turned to face my savior, letting out a little choked gasp when I realized that it had been Alphonse. Oh sweet Mary and Joseph I could hug him and never let go.

"Good save, Al," Edward panted, still a little strained from fending off the guy.

"Yeah," I gulped, voice croaky. "Thanks." I didn't trust myself to speak in simple, one word sentences.

Al chuckled, giving us a thumbs up. "No biggie." Ed followed his example, and I was somehow able to grin slightly.

* * *

The train had finally arrived in Central, and I was more than ready to get off the cursed, stupid transport that had caused me so much strife. Good freaking riddance.

"That wasn't how I expected to arrive in Central," I spoke breathlessly, trying to lessen the somewhat tense atmosphere. "Attacked by terrorists; can check that off the thing's I'd never thought would happen."

Alphonse chuckled cheerily, while Ed let out a grumble of sorts that sounded a lot like a noise of agreement. "You handled yourself pretty well, Madison," Alphonse said, and I whipped my head to him to give an incredulous look.

"Me?" I squeaked, pointing a hand at my chest. "I was useless. I nearly died a couple times; you guys did all the work!"

"I dunno," Edward piped in, and I whirled to face him this time. He had a scowl on his face, but his cheeks her tinged in what looked like embarrassment. "You saved me nearly twice; I wouldn't call that 'useless'." I didn't dare correct him. Instead, I hid my face behind my large curtain of hair, hiding my red face and bashful smile.

A yell of fury ruptured the air, and the three of us turned to see the leader of the terrorists leap at what looked like some sort of military officer. Before we could comprehend it, a huge explosion set off. A scream of torturous pain echoed in my ears, and my heart lept into my throat.

The explosion was gone as quickly as it came. What was left was the scarred man. I gagged, eyes widening with tears at the sudden smell of burnt flesh.

Soldiers came and took the man away, along with the other terrorists, and before long the other passengers were coming off.

Hughes came up to us, shaking his head at the man that the burnt man had tried to attack. "Same old Mustang; can't resist a show." Edward blinked, before he gasped in fury.

He ran off the Mustang to rant about something akin to the man planning to put him and Al on the train, to which Mustang responded he did nothing of the sort, (little liar, he totally did). He then mentioned about Edward having to prove his worth for the alchemy exam or something, but I wasn't completely listening.

Today had been... stressful. Ah, who was I kidding, it was complete hell. I had nearly died on a number of occasions. You never truly understand the fear of death until it stares you in the face, it's cold, icy hands drawing you in. But I faced that today. I faced it and I was somehow alive.

Never before had I wanted to go home so badly. Screw being able to meet my favorite characters. I just wanted to hug my parents and never let go. But I was trapped. I was trapped, playing a stupid pawn, a puppet meant for Truth's enjoyment. If it wanted me here, then it was sure as hell gunna stay that way.

"Madison?"

I blinked, flinching back from the hand that had been waving in front of my face. Alphonse chuckled, and I flushed.

"Sorry, spaced out there," I muttered brushing my hair from my face.

"It's okay, I don't blame you. It's been a long day," Alphonse replied, and I smiled. Y'know, Al was just the biggest teddy bear. Except he wasn't huggable. Well, I mean he was, but it wouldn't be very enjoyable. For either end. Then again, Al could probably need a hug every now and again. I personally wasn't much of a touchy-feely person, God knows how many times I tense when Kate would suddenly hug me. Hmm. Now that I think about it, Kate kinda reminded me of Al. Too kind for her own good, trusted people way easily than she should, and a huge obsession with cats. The one thing that she had in common with Ed was her shortness. God, she would get defensive, downright _violent_ when someone mocked her height. She was feisty, that one.

"-adison!"

"I am an innocent smol bean!" I screamed, scooting back from the person who yelled straight in my poor, poor ear, waving my arms in some pathetic attempt at self-defense.

I was faced with the laughing Elric brothers. Edward was hunched over, wiping tears from his eyes and nearly _wheezing_ at my defense, while Al was laughing much more politely.

" _Smol bean?! What kind of term is that?!"_ Edward gasped out between laughs, and I pursed my lips in embarrassment, placing my hands on my hips and sticking my nose in the air to gain some sense of the nonchalance I _did not have._

"I'll have you know smol bean is a totally acceptable term, as well as peasant, Commander Duck, hooligan, and turtle necked ducks." I blinked. "I use duck quite often. Hmm."

The two brothers stared at me in what looked like incredulous amusement, before Ed shook his head. "You're a very strange girl."

I stuck my chest out, smirking. "I'll take that as a compliment." They both chuckled.

"Well, we gotta get going," Edward suddenly spoke, grabbing his bag and as he began to walk away. "Nice to meet you. C'mon, Al!"

My heart sunk into my stomach. I didn't want them to go. I knew they had to, and that they didn't have time for a silly, scared girl like me, but... I was hoping, if I stayed with them... I could find a way back home. Maybe, somehow. I dunno.

Alphonse tapped my head, and I looked up at him from under my curtain of hair. He nodded his head to follow him, and if Al had his body, I'm sure he would be smiling.

"You don't have a place to go, do you?" Alphonse stated, loud enough for Edward to hear. The elder brother stopped, and I'm sure Al would be grinning deviously.

"No... I'm all alone for now..." I replied sadly, trying to contain my grin.

"Hmm... hey brother-"

"No," Edward cut in, giving Al a harsh stare. "We are not bringing a random girl with us."

"But brother, she doesn't know anyone, she's all alone!" Alphonse argued, towering over Ed. "Just for a bit, that's all I'm asking."

"Um, Ed..." I muttered, making the blond turn to me. I fidgeted under his gaze, biting my lip. "I know I'd be a burden. I wasn't very much help on the train, so I understand that you don't want me..." fake tears sprung to my eyes. "I'll somehow find a place. Maybe I'll study alchemy, find a job with that..."

Edward hesitated, and I nearly blew the act by nearly laughing. I turned around to hide my grin and began to walk away. _1, 2, 3..._

"Wait!"

I smirked. _Bingo._

I turned around to face Ed, putting on an innocent, curious expression. "Yes?" Ah, the wonderful powers of manipulation.

He scowled, avoiding my gaze. "You can stay with us..." he muttered. I smiled, before he pointed a finger in my face, giving me a harsh stare. "But only until you get some memories back!"

I blinked. "How'd you know that?"

He snorted. "I heard you talking to Al." I blushed, and he smirked. "Yeah; wasn't asleep."

"Sneaky," I said, repeating my earlier words. He chuckled, before turning around and walking away.

"Come one!" he said impatiently. I shared a smile with Al before we followed after the short blond. He turned his head to face me, before saying, "And I'm only letting you stay with us because you saved me twice, and because you're interested in alchemy. Can't let an inspiring alchemist get away."

I snorted like he had, giving him a closed eye smirk. "What ever helps you sleep at night, Ed."

* * *

 **AN: Cough* Uh... hi?**

 **I know it's been awhile... Just... things have been going on in my life that have been pretty stressful. I just moved in with my Nanna, and I also had to change schools due to personal reasons. It really took away my motivation. I lost interest for art and writing. I was depressed for awhile, but I kept it bottled up.**

 **** **Recently, someone was talking about this story, and how much they enjoyed it. It suddenly sparked my motivation, and writing has made me much more happy. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and expect some more soon!** **  
**

 **-Adios!**


	4. Chapter 4: Determination for the Future

**DISCLAIMER: If I owned FMA, I would speak Japanese, and Madison would be a real character**

* * *

Not surprisingly, only five minutes after we left the train station, a yawn escaped my lips. Quite obnoxiously. Ed snorted in amusement in front of me, and I tried to glare at my mouth. Stupid appendage, always disobeying me.

"Hey, brother, I think we should find a place to rest for the night," Alphonse spoke up after minutes of silence, due to my yawning.

Edward hummed in agreement. "Yeah, sure. We can stay at a house or something." He whirled around, narrowing his eyes at me. "I'm _not_ paying for her though; she wants to stay with us, she'll have to take care of herself." I pouted at him, trying to hide my suddenly pale skin.

I didn't have any money. What the hell would I do? I couldn't just rely on the brothers all the time, considering they probably didn't have much money themselves right now. Crap. Was this what adults have to do on a daily basis? Even more reason to sleep in my parent's basement, as I did not want to have responsibilities like that... if I ever made it back home...

Suddenly somber, I stuffed my hands into the pockets of my jeans. I blinked, eyebrows furrowing as my hand brushed against some sort of pouch. Taking it out, I inspected the inside, nearly letting out a squeal.

I guess Truth wasn't too bad. It (they? She? Who knows anymore) had given me a small amount of cash. It didn't look too different to Earth money, and I bet I could get used to it. Still wasn't colorful, maple smelling, Canadian money, though.

"Don't worry," I spoke, grinning. "I can pay for myself." Edward grumbled, making me snicker. Was probably using this plan to make me leave. Too bad; once you got The Sass Master, she ain't leaving.

We entered a small hotel, only about two stories high. We payed for our room, nearly dead on our feet, (Edward was mocking me when I quietly asked Al how the currency works. I stuck my tongue out childishly at him).

Entering the tiny hotel room with two twin beds, I collapsed onto one of them, letting out a tiny sigh. "The ginger is out of commission for now. Night night," I muttered into my pillow, voice muffled. Al's chuckle rung throughout his armor, making me blink. "Wait- Alphonse. There's only two beds, where are you gunna sleep?" I knew why he didn't need a bed, but I'd rather ask what I already knew than the brothers get suspicious.

The two Elric's froze. "OH! Uh... I-I don't sleep much, alchemy training and all! Besides, there's a couch!" Alphonse stuttered, chuckling nervously. I softly snorted, quietly enough so that they couldn't hear me.

"Mk... night guys."

God, I was tired. Today was... something. I would have snorted again if I had the energy. That was the understatement of the year. Just yesterday I had been studying math and joking with Kate, and today I faced death on a multiple of occasions. I'm surprised how calm I am right now, though I'm pretty sure it's more shock than anything.

There was shuffling as Ed prepared for bed. He quietly conversed with Al before he followed my example and passed out on the other bed.

I tossed and turned, but no matter what song I sung in my head, how many sheep I counted, or trying to imagine this was all a dream, I still couldn't fall asleep. I missed my bed back home, with it's twenty pillows and fluffy blankets. It's smell of chocolate and cat fur.

My head kept playing images of today over and over again. Falling off a train, being shot at, having the point of death stare straight in my face. I wanted to cry. I was so, so scared. Little, anxious Madison who could be frightened by a simple 'boo'. I kept repeating the words, 'Why me?' in my head, over and over like a broken record, trying to convince myself that it meant something.

I choked back my tears, not wishing any of the brothers to see my cry. It would cause unnecessary questions and complications that I honestly didn't want to deal with.

I sighed, running a hand through my long, red hair, grimacing at the grease. I'd have to take a shower tomorrow. And buy new clothes...

I sat up, stretching out my stiff limbs. Rubbing at my eyes, I glanced over to see Al sitting on the honestly very tiny couch. He took up more than half of it. +

Feeling a sudden urge of sympathy, I stood up on my tired legs and made my way to him. It was only a couple of steps, but it seemed more than that. I guess the shock of the day wore off, but it never really sunk in my mind that I had been talking to Edward and Alphonse. Edward and Alphonse Elric, alchemist brothers of one of my favorite pastimes, who suffered more than I could ever imagine.

Shakily, I sat down next to the younger brother. He jumped a little at my presence, and I tried to smile kindly at him, but it probably wasn't all that encouraging. "Hey."

"Madison? What are you doing up?" Alphonse asked quietly, trying not to wake his sleeping older brother.

I shrugged, pulling up my knees on the couch to hug them to my chest. "Couldn't sleep. You?"

He looked down at the book in his hands. "Just studying on some alchemy... I wanna be prepared for the Alchemy Exam," he replied.

"Alchemy Exam?" I asked, although I already knew. Gosh, this was going to get old real fast. I'm going to go crazy if I'm gonna have to keep playing dumb.

He nodded, closing his book to look at me. "Mhm. It's an exam the State does every year to scout for new state alchemists. Brother and I are joining."

I gave a toothy, closed eyed grin. "Well, good luck to you both. May the best brother pass." He chuckled, giving his thanks.

He passed me another alchemy book, a beginner's one that he kept around for sentimental value or something. It was hard to focus on the words, all of them flying over my head. Scowling, I was suddenly reminded why I hated science. I wouldn't say I was an avid learner... quite the opposite, actually. Kate was always freaking out about grades and making sure she stayed on top of her classes (now not so much), while I would just laugh at her on the sidelines. I was quite the procrastinator, and while I was by no means dumb, I wasn't all that interested in expressing my intellectual genius. Due to my taking french courses and Kate English (that girl couldn't speak french for the life of her), she never really knew what I did in class. So when I showed her my report card, let's say she was surprised. Freaking Commander Duck thought I was stupid.

"Madison?"

I blinked, turning to Alphonse giving me the equivalent of a curious look. "You okay? You've been staring at the same paragraph for five minutes."

I coughed, realizing he was right. "Just... thinking about my best friend." He tilted his head, urging me to continue. I smiled. "Her name is Kate. She's," I let out a soft scoff, "she's something."

"What do you mean?" Alphonse asked.

"Well... Commander Duck was quite the hilarious little emo munchkin." I stared seriously at him. "Don't tell her I said that; she'll punch me."

He laughed. "I won't." He stopped for a second. "Tell me more about her."

So I did. I told him about how she was a clumsy, awkward dork who hated when you mentioned her cursed shortness. How she stumbled over her sentences and repeated things too many times if she were excited about something. How we bonded over our mutual hate over gym, our love for art. How we both would smack each other when one of us would criticize something we would draw or write. How I would tease her about her gigantic crush on one of her favorite characters because, in her words, 'real people suck'. How we met, how we laughed, how close we were. Everything I could remember.

When my voice was hoarse from prolonged use, I looked down at my hands. I smiled faintly, remember times when I would pop out my thumb to freak her out. "I miss her. I wish I could figure out why I lost my memories and find a way home, just so I can see her again."

Alphonse was quiet, before he laid a hand on my head. "I hope you get your memories back."

I sniffed, wiping a few stray tears from my eyes. I hated crying in front of others. "So do I." I clenched the book in my hands tightly, eyebrows furring. "I'm gonna study alchemy, and I'm _going_ to get my memories back."

He patted my head. "You'll do it, I know you will." Even if he didn't know it, I could suspect it wasn't just me he was trying to persuade with those words.

Instead of letting him reflect on the words, I patted his chest-plate, giving him an appreciative smirk. "You're a great comfort buddy, Al." He chuckled, rubbing the back of his helmet bashfully. A yawn escaped my lips, and I rubbed at my tired eyes. "I should probably head to bed now," I said, yawning again, stretching my arms as my joints cracked pleasantly.

Alphonse nodded, but I smiled. "You can take the bed. You're much bigger than me; I don't think this tiny couch is doing any favors."

He argued with me for a bit, but I was pretty stubborn and couldn't be persuaded easily. Eventually he gave in, throwing me a pillow and a blanket. This time, when I closed my eyes, I was lulled into the blissful dreamland of sleep.

* * *

The next morning, after a shower, I threw on the clothes I had from yesterday, and we were off. Ed mentioned something about having to meet Mustang, and I was slightly nervous. I'm not too sure how Mustang will react to me. He knew about the brother's and how talented they were, but he knew nothing about me. He may even kick me out and forbid me from researching alchemy with the brothers.

"Stop it," Edward whined in front of me, and I scowled.

"What do you mean?" I growled.

He turned his head back to face me, eyes furrowed. "I can _hear_ you thinking, and it's giving me a headache." I bit my lip, looking away from him.

"I don't know how this Mustang will react to me. What if he won't let me study with you? What if I don't find a way home because of that?" I mumbled softly, worry lacing my voice.

"Don't worry about it."

I looked back up, staring at his back in confusion. He stared ahead, not turning around to face me. "You're with us now, right? He can't complain about it." I blinked, before I looked down with a bashful smile.

"Thanks."

He didn't reply, but I was okay with that. I didn't want him to continue and let me look stupid by saying something as equally stupid. I was surprised I had done as well as I had by now.

Before long, we arrived at Central command. It was quite the impressive, intimidating sight, with it's watch towers and soldiers every few feet. I can't say I've ever been near a military sight, but this one could take the cake. Heh, that rhymed...

Ed led us to the entrance, showing some sort of clearance to see Mustang to the front guards. They let us through, although with major skepticism. I stuck my tongue out at them when they weren't looking.

Another soldier led us through the halls, pointing out where certain rooms were and what their purpose was. I tried to listen, but my mind was just too frenzied to pay attention.

By the time we arrived at Mustang's office, my heart was beating in my chest. I didn't trust to open my mouth and to wheeze instead of talking.

Finally, we were standing in front of Mustang, his intimidating eyes searching over us, his hands clasped near his mouth. I gulped, trying to avoid his gaze by hiding behind a much larger Alphonse.

"So," Mustang began, a smirk tugging at his lips. "You boys believe you're ready for the exam."

"You bet I do," Edward replied, giving a smirk of his own. "You should tell the other contestants they shouldn't even bother showing up."

Mustang chuckled, closing his eyes. "Careful Ed, that arrogance might just came back to bite you one day." Edward didn't reply for once, so Mustang pushed a small document towards us. Alphonse picked it up, beginning to read. "As you should know, contestants have to find their own training; the state doesn't provide that for you. However, I recommend him; The Sewing Life Alchemist, Shou Tucker."

For some reason, the name brought a shiver down my spine. My throat tightened, my heart falling to my stomach.

I shook it off, leaning over Al's shoulder to read the document. "He's quite the researcher, and I'm quite certain his extensive research will help you in the long run." Mustang chuckled, as if thinking about an inside joke. "Practically wrote the book on bringing things to life."

The brothers froze on either side of me, and I scowled at the alchemist in front of me. That was completely uncalled for. "I've already talked to Tucker, and he doesn't mind letting you two study under him." Ed and Al relaxed, happy to know that, but Mustang narrowed his eyes. "However; I'm not too certain if he'll mind your sudden new friend."

I tensed, cursing inwardly. I had hoped that he would just ignore me, but deep inside I knew that wouldn't have been possible. I curled in on myself under his gaze, goosebumps appearing on my skin.

"I-I-I'm M-Madison," I stuttered, looking at my hands as I cracked them nervously. "I-I'm studying alchemy because I wanna find s-something."

Mustang frowned, eyes cold as he stared me down. "Alchemy isn't some magical art that will grant your every wish; it's not meant for kids, and certainly not a nervous wreck such as yourself."

I flinched, hands tightly clenching my jeans. I was in near tears at this point, frustration and anger welling up inside me. But I was too afraid to fight back.

"Madison's with us. Where we go, so does she."

I stared at Ed in shock, his eyes trained on Mustang, eyebrows furrowed in certainty. Why was he being so... kind to me? Last time I checked, he just barely wanted me with them. Why did he want me to stay now? What had changed?

Mustang let out an exhale through his nose. "Very well." He stood up, heading towards the door. "Follow me."

He led us to the entrance where a car was waiting. For once, I was in the front, the two brothers behind me.

"...hy are you helping Madison?"

I perked up, the question Alphonse asked sparing curiosity in myself. I strained my ears, listening for Edward's response.

He stayed quiet for a few seconds, before he replied, "I heard her talking about her home last night." Oh. So he wasn't asleep. Great. "...It reminded me of how determined we were to get Mom back." Sadness ebbed in my chest, and I felt even more sympathy for them.

So, I turned around, pouting. "C'moon, slowpokes! I wanna read as much as I can and we're gunna be 200 years late if you continue being that slow!" They chuckled, before running up to us.

Before long, we were all packed in a tiny car heading towards Tucker's. It was quite the tight fit, especially considering Alphonse's large body. It was quite uncomfortable.

"He what?!"

I flinched, rubbing at my sore ear from Edward's shout. "Jeez, Ed. No need to make me deaf," I muttered.

No one replied to me, but I expected that. Forever alone. "Yes, making a talking chimera was quite the feat. Scientists are still baffled by it. Needless to say, he was appointed state alchemist," Mustang replied to Edward's screech. "I believe it was some sort of anomaly by using different animals with different genes, but people still aren't too sure."

"That's amazing," I commented, somehow finding my voice.

Alphonse nodded. "Definitely."

We arrived at Tucker's, and Mustang spoke, "It won't be just you three; he has a four year old, so try to keep the crass comments to yourself, Edward."

I made a face. "Eew, children."

Edward snorted beside me, while Alphonse tilted his head curiously. "You don't like kids?" he asked.

I grimaced. "I wouldn't say that I dislike them, just that I don't... know how to interact with them. And they're too hyper for their own good."

"Rich, coming from you," Edward commented. "You're quite the kid yourself." I gave him a look, and he scowled. "Don't give me that; I saw you stick your tongue out at those soldiers."

I stuck my nose in the air. "And you're quite the hypocrite yourself, Elric."

His eye twitched, and a giggle rose in my throat. His mouth opened to make a snarky retort, but before he could utter it, a white, fluffy mass came outta _freaking_ _nowhere_ and tackled Edward to the ground.

Ed let out an undignified scream, a wheeze following right after. The dog sitting atop of him whined happily, tongue rolled out in pants. I of course, was being an impossibly kind person, and laughing hysterically at Edward's pain.

"Awexander, you know that's bad."

I stopped my laughing immediately, whirling around to face the little girl and an older man standing in the doorway. The little girl in pig-tails was frowning (more of a pout really) at the dog sitting on Ed.

"Oh my, please excuse my dog," the man said, rubbing his neck bashfully. "He's supposed to be chained up right now."

"It-s... okay," Edward puffed out. "Just... don't tell him to roll over." I opened my mouth with a smirk, causing him to glare at me. "Don't even dare."

The man had introduced himself as Shou Tucker, after assisting us to get the dog off of Edward. He led us inside his rather large estate, dusty and messy. I wrinkled my nose, coughing at the dust particles.

"Please forgive the disarray of my home; I'm afraid I'm not quite the housekeeper my wife was, and I haven't had the time since becoming a State Alchemist," Mr. Tucker admitted, preparing us some tea. I didn't mind too much. Lord knows how messy my own bedroom was.

"Papa, big brother's hands are so big! They're like our pots and pans!" little Nina exclaimed in awe, holding Al's large finger in his hands. She tilted her head curiously, before saying, "aren't they heavy?"

Awe... Although I said I wasn't very good with kids, Nina was impossible to hate. Especially when she turned her head and saw me, her grin only got wider as she gasped, "Wow! Big sister has pwetty red hair!" she giggled, skipping over to me. I stumbled, awkwardly crouching down so she wouldn't yank my hair in her prodding.

"Who might this be?" Mr. Tucker asked, blinking at me curiously. I gulped, eyes darting to Nina who was giggling as she put small little braids in my hair. He chuckled. "Nina, why don't you go to the courtyard? I'm sure Alexander wants someone to play with."

"Awe," she pouted sadly, before turning back to me. "Can I braid your hair later? Pretty _please?"_

I couldn't resist that face, dammit. "Sure," I smiled, ruffling her hair. She giggled happily, skipping into the hallway.

"Are you a friend of the Elric's?" Mr. Tucker asked me. "I wasn't aware you were going to be studying with them."

"Um..." I mumbled, avoiding his gaze. "Yeah, I am. I hope you don't mind me intruding."

Mr. Tucker smiled pleasantly at me. "I don't mind in the least. You may stay as long as you want." I let out a sigh of relief. "Now, if you three are considering to take the alchemy exam, you're going to need more than an overnight cram session. I'd recommend you start studying now." Ha! Reminds me of exams back home. Those were not fun at all.

He led us down a few, dusty, cluttered hallways, stacked with books and papers. My maman would have had an aneurysm if she saw it all.

"Here it is," Mr. Tucker said, opening a large door. I gasped in awe, eyes shining in glee at all the books. My ears caught Mr. Tucker's chuckle. "Feel free to dive in." Edward wasted no time, rushing forward to quickly scan through the books.

Alphonse chuckled. "Looks like he already did." He turned to me. "Let's get started, Madison."

I nodded in response. "Yeah!"

"Argh..." I groaned, eyes stinging and head pounding. I slumped as we walked to the kitchen, my back giving out from sitting in extremely uncomfortable positions all day. "My head feels like it's going to explode."

Edward barked out a laugh in front of me. "A day of studying and you're already exhausted?"

I scowled. "Hey, I just started learning alchemy, cut me some slack." He mocked me by repeated my words in a hushed voice.

Mr. Tucker had prepared a nice meal of potatoes and steak, and I devoured it in my hunger. I hadn't ate much throughout the day... or yesterday... God was I famished.

"How did your studying go?" Mr. Tucker asked politely, gently helping Nina with her food.

"I read so much," Edward replied, swallowing his food. "But there's still so much I don't know. I want to read as much as I can before the exam."

"You're determination is very admirable," Mr. Tucker said, smiling at the blond. "But you needn't worry yourself so much; you're still so young. You can take the exam another year."

Edward frowned. "No. I don't care how hard it'll be, I'm going to take this test, and I'm going to pass. I don't give excuses." I could see the conflict in his face, so I nudged his arm with my elbow, making him face me as I smiled at him. He tried to give one back.

"Oh no!" Nina suddenly exclaimed in worry. "Big brother isn't eating his dinner! That won't do, you have to eat to grow strong and big!" It was a rather cute sight, if the implications behind it weren't so sad.

"Oh, um! I think I'm plenty grown-"

"No, you have to eat! No excuse!" Nina apparently wasn't having any of it, pushing a slice of bread in Alphonse's direction with a tiny determined pout.

Alphonse let out a sigh, before grabbing the piece of bread and pausing. He lifted his helmet, tossing the food into his armor. "Mmh! Sure tastes good!" he exclaimed in false happiness.

Nina giggled. "Good! Now eat the steak!"

Once again, Ed was looking down. That wouldn't do.

Hmm... Therapist Mads to the rescue!

I placed a bit of potato on my fork, and aiming carefully, tongue out in concentration, I flicked back the utensil.

Miraculously, it made it's mark. Right in the middle of Ed's forehead.

He blinked, before slowly turning to me in confusion. I froze, cold sweat on the back of my neck. "Uh..." Crap. Why had I done that. _Kill me now_

Then he laughed.

"Um..." I muttered, flushing as the others began to laugh with him.

"What was that about?" Edward was able to ask, giving me a confused glance, still letting out a few chuckles.

"I-I dunno... it just got awkward, so I went to change the subject," I answered, glancing at my lap. "Sorry."

"Nah, it's fine." I was thankful for that, even if it was still embarrassing.

After dinner, Mr. Tucker lead us down some more hallways, stopping in front of a door. "This is your room," he said, directing it to Ed and Al, "and right down the hall is yours, Madison."

I smiled. "Thanks for all your hospitality."

He smiled back. "It's no problem, honestly. I don't mind a bit. Besides, Nina seems quite taken with you." My smile turned bashful. "Anyway, I won't keep you any longer. Goodnight."

"Goodnight Mr. Tucker," all three of us replied as he walked off.

I sighed, letting out a tired yawn. "I'm gunna hit the hay. Night."

"Goodnight Madison."

I entered my room, closing the door behind me. It wasn't too big, but it was much larger than my own bedroom. It was barren and only had a small bed and a desk. It felt cold and empty. I didn't like the feeling.

I didn't bother to change. It wasn't like I had any clothes to begin with. Instead, I tumbled into the tiny bed, letting out an exhausted sigh. Today was long and tiring, filled with equations and numbers that I didn't understand. I didn't get any progress.

Maybe I wouldn't ever find a way home...

A few, stray tears entered my eyes, but I furiously wiped them away. I _would not_ cry, dammit. I was stronger than that. I would keep studying, until Ed became a state alchemist, and then I would find a way back. I wouldn't let anything get in the way.

With that in mind, I was quickly pulled into sleep.

* * *

 **AN: Hey guys! Surprised I updated so quickly? Me too!**

 **I gotta say, I'm really surprised at the feedback I got for last chapter. It makes me so happy to see people enjoying Spirited Away, and some still sticking around with it after such a long hiatus (Eedakon). I hope this chapter will do as well!**

 **And so, Madison has decided what she is going to do. She has met Tucker and Nina, and because of what Truth did to her, she can't remember what Nina's fate is. What will Madison do? Will she remember? (Ooh, spoopy)**

 **I hope I kept the characters in character. Edward is surprisingly hard to write. And despite Madison being my best friend, it'a hard to write for her as well xD**

 **Oh! And in case you couldn't tell, Kate is le moi.**

 **Anyhow** **, that's enough for now. Until next time, in "The Night of the Chimera's cry". Will Madison's involvement change the events? Who knows? :D**

 **-Adios!**


	5. Chapter 5: Snowball Fights

**DISCLAIMER: Nope, don't have the creativity to make FMA**

* * *

To be honest, my determination from last night wore off with the after effects of sleep. I was freaking _exhausted,_ starving and in desperate need of a nice, long, relaxing shower.

In low spirits, I exited my small room rubbing crust from my eyes and grimacing as I flicked it away. The hallways were empty, which wasn't too surprising. From the way the sun streamed through the windows, it looked like it was later in the morning. Which, again, wasn't surprising. I had a massive tendency to sleep in as much as I could.

As my stomach grumbled, I tried to find my way back to the kitchen. It was a pretty large house though, even more complicated than the dirty, messy halls of my country school. After many minutes of cursing and grumbling, I stumbled into the disorganized room that was the kitchen.

No one was there, which made me feel awkward and out of place. I didn't want to touch anything in fear of accidentally burning the house to the ground, which admittedly is something I'd probably do.

So ignoring my rumbling stomach, I sat down and began to flip through an alchemy book.

It was disheartening. I couldn't understand the words at all. The elements and equations hurt my head, my eyes not quite being able to focus on the words. It was frustrating and I was too stubborn to merely close the book.

"Oh! Madison!"

Mr. Tucker's voice broke me from my self-pitying thoughts, croaky from sleep. I slammed the book shut, smiling at him to hide my anger. "Good morning."

He smiled back pleasantly. "Good morning."

He asked if I wanted breakfast, which my growling stomach answered. My face was still flushed from embarrassment. Before long, the smell of blueberry waffles wafted through the air, a plate of the golden-brown goodness placed in front of me, maple syrup on the side, just the way I liked it.

Once I had gulped down my meal, he handed two plates for the brothers to bring with me to the library. I had to balance them in my arms carefully, but thankfully I had somehow made it there without dropping the food.

The brothers were deep in their studying, nose buried deep in books. I wondered how long they'd been up.

Alphonse was the first to notice my presence. He perked up, exclaiming, "Madison!" cheerfully.

I smiled, setting the plates down on the floor, sitting down beside him. "Morning!" I replied, with far more enthusiasm than I felt. Edward didn't even seem to notice I was there, causing me to chuckle. Perfect opportunity.

I sneaked up behind him, holding a finger to my lips at Alphonse. He shook his head, letting out a small snort of amusement. Trying to hold in my own laughter, I suddenly poked my hand right on the back of the blond's neck letting out a shout of, 'Boo!'

It was safe to say his reaction was priceless. He let out a scream, hunching in on himself as he slapped the back of his neck. He whirled around to face me with incredulous eyes. I was too busy laughing.

"Did you seriously just do that?" he croaked out in shock. I nodded, still giggling. "That wasn't funny!"

"It was pretty funny, brother," Alphonse replied, letting out his own laughter. Edward grumbled in response, none too happy with the way his sibling was treating him.

Before long, we were dipped back into peaceful silence. I tried to focus on the words in front of me, but they were just so complicated. Science was never my forte. It had too many theories and equations and things to figure out. Not that math wasn't any different, but it didn't have things like freaking physics and elements mixed in.

I gave up after 30 minutes. It just wasn't happening. Instead, to relieve myself of stress, I took one of Edward's papers, along with a pencil. It was different than the ones that I was used to, but it would have to do.

I got lost in the lines I created. I may not be great at science or anything to do with it, but I excelled in the beauty of art. Kate said I had a knack for it, and while I tried to deny it (she herself was quite the exceptional artist), I did know that my art was something to be proud of.

"What'cha drawing?" Alphonse's voice yanked a startled yelp from me. I whirled around, tightly holding my drawing to my chest. Alphonse knelt behind me, curiosity just oozing from him.

"N-nothing!" I replied, stuttering from my embarrassment. "Psh, what made you think I was drawing? H-heh..."

He would have raised an eyebrow if he could. "Really?"

"Yup."

"Uh-huh..."

"Mhm."

"... You're not fooling me, Madison."

I held on tighter. "Well, even if I was drawing, I wouldn't show you." Childishly, I stuck my tongue out.

"What? Why?" he inquired with a bit of hurt. Oh well.

"'Cause!" I shouted, hiding the page behind my back. "Just because you're somehow great with the puppy dog look, does not mean that I'll-"

"What's this?"

"Eep!" My drawing was ripped from my hands, and a little giggle followed. Nina was looking at my drawing, entranced by it.

"It's so pwetty!"

"Hehe, thanks, but could you give it back now?" I stuttered nervously, not used to people looking at my art.

"Hmm, I dunno, it'd be a shame to."

I groaned in embarrassment, hiding my face with my hands as Edward joined in on the fun. He was snickering, which displeased me greatly.

"It looks great! Why are you so embarrassed?" Alphonse inquired, ever the mediator.

"I'm not used to letting people look at my drawings," I mumbled, refusing to look at any of them.

"Big sister, can you draw me another pretty picture?" Nina asked curiously, and I peeked through my fingers almost melting at her grin.

Her nickname for me made me give in, not being able to resist such a cute face either. "Fine," I sighed.

She giggled in excitement. "Yay! Big sister's gunna draw me another pretty picture!"

Before long, Nina was seated before me, laying on her stomach, chin held in her palms. Her eyes never left my page, watching carefully as I drew for her. My face didn't stop it's flushing. I wasn't used to little kids paying attention to me since Kate was much more equipped for it. But I didn't seem to be doing too bad, since she loved the mermaid, unicorn and other mystical creatures I drew. The brothers didn't join in on our giggling, too focused on their reading, but I didn't mind. It was peaceful.

* * *

Before I knew it, a week passed by in a blur. Days came and went, filled with attempted studying, the occasional rant of frustration, lunch, more reading, occupying Nina, dinner, then bed. To be honest, the constant schedule was getting to me. My hands were fidgeting, I was twitching, and I just wanted to do something. I missed my Ipod already, with all its apps and equipment that was able to entertain me.

I growled for the umpteenth time, glaring heatedly at the small circle I had made in a small patch of dirt. It was the beginning of January apparently, so it had snowed just a few days prior. It was cold, but not unbearably so. "You're not doing it right."

I huffed stubbornly, glaring at Edward from the corner of my eye. "Fine. Tell me what I'm doing wrong, since you're such a _prodigy._ " Crap. That was a terrible comeback. He _was_ a prodigy.

He scoffed, thinking the same thing I was. Our relationship thus far consisted of witty banter and teasing. He was just so easy to rile up, and, if I'm being honest, so was I.

"Well, first of all, you drew it wrong," he said, crouching down beside me. "The circle is all crooked, and you don't have the correct amount of circles surrounding the edge."

I sighed, throwing my hands up in exasperation. "Yes, Edward, I'm quite aware of that since this is my _thirtieth time failing_! Do tell me more!"

He narrowed his eyes at me with a glare, my yell obviously not pleasing him. "You don't have to snap at me."

I let out another sigh, plopping down in the snow. "I know. Sorry." He shrugged, his temper somehow holding in despite my very, very petty attitude.

"I can help you-"

Immediately, I replied, "No," harshly, glaring down at the stupid circle. "I don't need your help."

Edward let out an exasperated growl, obviously getting more and more annoyed with me. I was surprised he hadn't already left.

"Look. You can pout and snap all you want, but unless you try, you're never gunna learn, or find a way back home. You're just going to give up that easy?"

Anger welled up in me. How dare he. How dare he even suggest that. He didn't even know me, how could he even assume that I would do something as terrible as give up? Even if deep down that was exactly what I wanted to do? How could he even assume I would?

A choked laugh escaped my lips, my hands shaking at my sides griping tightly at the snow as I gave him a fake, sickly sweet smile. "Mhm, you just said exactly what I'm thinking. This is too hard, I'm just going to give up. Yup. Never going to see my parents, my sister, or my grandma again. Never going to go home, or laugh with my friends. Instead, oh! I'll just stay here in this stupid place forever! Is that what you thought I was going to do?! Huh Ed?!"

In my anger, I just wanted to lash out, hit something. My arm swung, and as I breathed deeply from my shouting, I realized...

I had thrown snow into Ed's face.

I huffed, turning away, hiding my red face as I scowled. "You deserved that..."

He didn't answer, and my scowl dropped, thinking he had walked away. I sighed, not particularly blaming him.

That is, until something cold and wet was thrown to the back of my head

I whipped around, giving an incredulous look towards Ed who was somehow able to pull off a serious expression with all the snow covering his face. "First rule; never turn your back," he said, earning a well deserved confused look from me. "Second rule; never underestimate your enemy." What the hell what he rattling on about? He scooted closer, and poked my head with his automail finger despite the glare I threw at him. "Third rule; never, ever give up."

"What's that?" I asked, glaring at his finger as he retracted it.

"The rules you need to follow if you want to stay with Alphonse and I," he replied, giving me a small smirk as he pat my head. I ducked, avoiding his gaze as my anger from earlier faded away. His words were able to stir something in me. I wasn't going to give up, even if the path ahead was hard.

Ed barked out a laugh, before turning around to head back inside, but I wasn't about to let him walk away without any repercussions. I may have forgiven him, but he still had to pay for what he said.

So, with a devilish laugh under my breath, I grasped a patch of snow and hurled it in his direction.

Somehow, it hit it's mark, and I was able to hit it hard enough to make him stumble. He turned to look at me, and I whistled innocently, avoiding his narrowing eyes. "I should tell you," Ed began, kneeling down to scoop up some snow making my laughter cease immediately. "That once you challenge me to a snowball fight," he smirked, "I ain't backing out."

I squeaked as he flung the snowball at me, haphazardly diving out of the way of the projectile. I faced him, laughing. "Ha! Missed-" Another was flung into my face.

His laughter replaced mine, holding his abdomen as he snorted in mirth. "That's it!" I shouted, standing up and bolting over. Abruptly, his laughter ceased as his eyes widened, wisely moving away from me.

"Come back here you blond pipsqueak!" I yelled, knowing that it would set him off. He took the bait, like I thought, whirling around to yell back in anger but was instead greeted with a snowball to the gut. He wheezed in slight pain, drowned out by my snickering, glaring at me.

He then began to chase me, and because I wasn't the best in P.E, he easily caught up to me and stuffed snow in my hood while cackling. In revenge, I tackled him into the snow.

"Hey, Ed. I don't think we've seen this book- what are you two doing?" Al deadpanned, walking in the middle of my stuffing snow in Ed's hood as he yelled in protest. We were both frozen, staring at him with wide eyes.

"He offended me so I threw a snowball at him," I answered without hesitation.

"And then I stuffed snow into her hood," Ed continued.

"Yay! A snowball fight! A snowball fight!" Nina giggled, coming from behind Alphonse, tugging on a hat. "I wanna join! I wanna join!"

"Well, you best prepare yourself then," I snickered, packing a bunch of snow into my hands. "Cause I ain't gunna go easy on ya!"

She squealed as I hurled a snowball at her, strategically dodging behind a very tall and unfortunate Alphonse. He gasped in surprise as the snow hit him square in the face, effectively making me laugh. His exclamation of, "What'd I do?!" only made me laugh further.

"How could you?! I will avenge you Al!" Ed shouted, throwing a well-aimed snowball at my stomach, cutting off my laughter that turned into a wheeze.

Their laughter effectively made me quite angry, so I gathered snow in my hands, and with a shout of, "Goute du neige, vous paiens!" I pelted them with snow.

Thus ensued a terrible, terrible snow war, filled with pain and death and laughter. Nina and Ed ganged up on Al and I, so I suggested we start an alliance. Which, if I were being honest, was kinda unfair since Al was able to block me and I was able to assault the other two with snow.

"Wait- where'd they go?" Al questioned, whirling around.

I narrowed my eyes with a nod. "They fear our combined power, dear general. Most likely they have fled. Those cowards!" Al seemed to enjoy my deep, very convincing military voice, as he promptly burst into laughter.

"Now, Nina!"

"Wah!"

Al was tackled from above, sent tumbling to the ground, and, unfortunately, bringing me with him.

With a face full of snow, my ears caught the series of laughter from Ed, Nina and Al. I joined in, their joy completely contagious. I rolled over, my stomach hurting from my giggles and snickers. "Merde, c'est la premiere fois j'ai rigole comme ca depuis que nous savons arrives!" Ed rolled over to face me, his laughter dying down enough to say, "You spoke like that earlier. What does it mean?"

I sat on my elbows, calming down just a bit. "It's a language from where I'm from. It's called french."

Alphonse hummed, sitting cross-legged as Nina climbed up his armor to sit on his shoulders. "I've never heard of it. You must be pretty far from home." I nearly scoffed. _You don't know the half of it._

Nina yawned, and I was able to muster a smile. "Looks like little etoile is tired." We walked back into the warm house devoid of any cold snow, and gave Nina to Mr. Tucker to tuck in while we unwind-ed for the night. It was back to more studying tomorrow.

* * *

 **AN: Uh... hey guys.**

 **You have no idea how sorry I am. Life got really rough these past few months and a lot has changed. It was hard to get the motivation to even write. But here it is. It's probably not too good, and also probably has a lot of mistakes (I know older chapters have them). Also, please forgive my french. I'm not the best at it unlike Madison.**

 **Speaking of. You know how I mentioned things have changed in the past few months? Yeah, well, uh... Madison and I are now dating! *Confetti* Don't ask me how I did it, cuz like I don't know myself. I have the qualities of a beaver, so. Anyway! I wouldn't have mentioned it if it wasn't important. It won't change the story drastically, besides the fact that I may have to fite Edward over my girlfriend.**

 **Also, timelines! In this story, Madison and Ed will be about 14 by this chapter, 15 when they take the exam. They'll be with Tucker for perhaps a year. I really want to establish Madison into this universe, and have her prepared for the rest to come. Plus I felt they were too young to have it begin when they were 12. A lot of who Madison is occurred when she was 13-14, so.**

 **I'm gunna try my best to update more, but it'll be pretty sporadic. Please don't hate me**

 **If you have any questions or comments leave a review. I also have tumblr and discord if you ever want to reach me! :3**

 **-Adios!**


	6. Blood, bonding and cookies, oh my!

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own FMA. Also, be warned for mentions of detailed gore.**

* * *

"Big sister makes the prettiest drawings! Right?! Big sister can you draw Elicia and me a drawing? Pretty please?"

I balked under the combined puppy-eyed look from Nina and Elicia. I turned to Ed, seeking some sort of help, but he pretended to not notice. That traitor. If Al were here, he'd definitely help me. If only he didn't come with that stupid excuse of _studying_.

"Please big sister?" Elicia asked, tugging at my sweater.

"S-sure," I replied, regretting it immediately as the two little girls squealed in happiness.

I ended up drawing a unicorn, which they enjoyed immensely. Then again, all kids liked unicorns. Except Kate.

"Hey, Hughes, why are we here?" Edward asked in annoyance as the two girls continued their shrieking.

"No reason. Just thought it'd be nice for you two to get out of the house once and a while," he answered, giving a large toothy smile to the boy. I didn't believe him, but I didn't have the energy to confront him either.

"Do you two mind spaghetti for diner?" Gracia asked, poking her head through the kitchen doorway with a smile.

"I don't mind," I replied, while Ed just gave an affirmtive grunt.

I liked Gracia. An air of calm and comfort radiated from her and her motherly smile as she retreated back into the kitchen.

There was no doubt that the household was the picture perfect loving family. Hughes and Gracia were the most kind and loving parents to their daughter, Elicia, the four year old full of curiosity and laughter. I tried to stay away from her as best I could, but it was a bust.

I was not good with kids.

"Why does little brother have a braid?" Elicia asked curiously with a pout, tilting her head to inspect the blond. He grunted in annoyance and tried to move away from her, but she merely climbed the couch and onto his shoulders to my amusement. She began to tug on his hair with giggles of, "Up, horsie! Up!" forcing him to comply lest she rip his hair off, which lead to him jumping around the living room with a shrieking Elicia.

"Now, now, settle down. Time for dinner," a grinning Gracia laughed delightfully, interrupting Edward as he ran around. He flushed under her gaze, and though he tried to deny it, he had been having fun.

Dinner wasn't something I was used to. Back at my home, dinner was going to the kitchen, getting your food and then moving to some part of the house to your own devices. I wasn't used to the chatter or the conversations mixed in with the squeaking of plates or the sound of glasses being placed back on the table, or Gracia's soft chiding of, "Don't talk with your mouth full," to Elicia or Nina. In the end, though, I couldn't help but smile. It was... nice.

"So, Madison, where did you grow up?"

I froze, my fork halfway to my mouth (this spaghetti was the best I ever had). I noticed Ed turn to me in worry, but I avoided looking at him. Placing my fork back down on the plate with a cough, I chuckled, "To tell the truth, I can't quite remember."

Hughes raised an eyebrow at me as he added more than enough salt to his plate. "What do you mean?" he inquired, his eyes never leaving me.

Fidgeting under all the attention, I quietly wished I were Nina or Elicia, who chatted away without any inquiry to the suddenly tense atmosphere that surrounded the table. I laughed again, my defense mechanism, as I added, "Well, it's all kind of fuzzy." I swallowed a sip of water to calm my nerves and to delay further questioning.

"What about your family, dear?" Gracia, while, bless her, was only trying to be kind, I was silently cursing at inside my head.

Shrugging, I tore at a bun and ate it even though I hated the decision after. _I didn't even like bread why did I think that was a better alternative_? "I can remember bits and pieces like family and friends, but my home and where I lived is all a blur."

"You poor thing," Gracia gasped, looking at me sullenly and I tried not to scowl. I didn't like _pity_.

"There's not much I can do besides try to get my memory back and push forward," I replied, going back to my food and hoping beyond all belief that the conversation would just drop. Thankfully, it did, and the table went back to its comfortable atmosphere that had been present earlier.

Dinner ended and I offered to help take the plates to the kitchen while Ed went to bed and Hughes went to tuck the girls into bed. Gracia declined at first, but I eventually persuaded her since they had so gracefully (ha) took us in for the night.

The kitchen delved into a quiet, comfortable silence with the sounds of running water and dishes clanking. I dried them as Gracia washed them in the sink, and it wasn't too long before they were done.

"You know, Madison, you're always welcome here."

I paused in the middle of wringing the dishrag I had used to dry the dishes, and turned to a sullen Gracia. Tilting my head, I said, "While I appreciate the sentiment... what do you mean?"

She turned to me, and I nearly backed away in shock at the tears in her eyes. "I'm sorry," she sputtered, wiping them away, "It's just... I can't imagine how it must feel, to not remember your home, or where you're from."

It tore me up inside to know that I had lied to her. That I made her _this_ emotional and I couldn't even tell her the truth. That I _did_ know where I was from but I had just made up some half-baked excuse so I could travel with the brothers for my own selfish reasons.

Despite this, she wrapped me up in a hug, and it took everything in my power to not flinch away. "So I just want you to know that even if you can't remember your own, you'll always have a home here, okay?" I nodded against her shoulder as I returned the hug, silently hiding the tears that came to my eyes from her kind and compassionate voice.

Gracia backed away and let out a choked laugh, grasping my shoulders. "Well, enough of that. You should be heading to bed! A young aspiring alchemist needs her sleep!" I nodded with a smile, warmth enveloping my chest.

I found myself walking into mine and Edward's shared bedroom for the night five minutes later with a yawn. He grunted in annoyance when the light hit his face, making me snort. "Baby," I teased, flopping down on my bed.

"Jerk."

"Psh, you can do better than that."

"Spawn of Satan?"

I nodded. "Better than assbutt."

"I don't understand you sometimes."

"That makes two of us." I laughed as he halfheartedly threw a pillow at me. "Jokes on you 'cause now I have another pillow," I sang, snuggling closer to it. He merely snorted in reply.

* * *

Morning came with bad news.

Ed and I tumbled out of bed when we heard commotion outside, only to find Hughes frowning as he talked to another officer. He spotted us, and he nodded in a mute greeting. "Wish I could say good morning," he said with a grim face.

"What happened?" Edward questioned.

Hughes' frown seemed to deepen. "Get changed. I want to show you the work of being in the military."

We found ourselves in the back of a military car heading down the streets. Hughes was up in the front, his frown still marking his face. Both Ed and I tried hard not to fidget, but eventually my curiosity got the best of me as I asked, "So where are we going?"

Hughes looked at me from the rear-view mirror, before looking forward again. "A murder scene."

My body chilled.

"Lately, there have been a string of murders happening around the city of Central," he continued. "Woman of all ages have been the victims of the murderer, whom we have decided to name Barry the Chopper."

Barry the Chopper? God, why did that sound so familiar? Is it part of my lost memory? Maybe if I went to the crime scene I would regain some of it, as much as I dreaded to do so.

Edward's grip on his knee tightened considerably as he croaked out, "And I don't suppose his name is due to the fact that he chops up his victims?"

Hughes nodded. "Right on the dot."

My throat tightened as I gulped. The car was filled with a tense silence as the driver continued on.

We arrived at the crime scene far too quickly for my liking. My hands shook as I opened my door, and I tried not to flinch as the heavy sound of a child sobbing assaulted my ears. Officers were looking mournfully down an alleyway, spaced away so they wouldn't step on the trail of fresh blood that lead to it.

My hands found themselves wrapped around my arms for some sense of comfort, but I still found myself shivering at the sight of a crying child holding tightly onto the bundle of cloth placed over what I assumed to be the victim.

I barely noticed Hughes place a hand on my shoulder.

"Mama! _Mama_! Wake up mama!" the child, her son, cried mournfully over her body as he shook with sobs. God, I wanted to wrap him up in my arms and protect him from the sight so bad. My throat tightened from my own sobs just watching.

I should have noticed Edward flinch beside me.

"Please, Henry, you have to let go," another officer whispered to the boy, an arm wrapped around his shoulders.

Henry began to scream harder. "No! Let me **_go_**! I want mama!" he shouted, struggling against the officer and tightening his hold on the sheet.

The officer sighed. "Forgive me," he said, placing his hands under Henry's armpits despite him beginning to scream louder and tugged him up.

Henry screamed bloody murder, refusing to leave his mother as his grip held on. Bringing the sheet with him.

I've seen blood before. I've seen broken bones and bruises and cuts. _I've seen_ pictures of horrid injuries late at night for research to a story. What I _haven't_ seen is a dead body. I've never seen someone's blank eyes, stuck in horror of their last moments before death. I've never seen a body so horridly ravaged and broken or bloody. **_I've never seen_** so much blood surround a person or their limbs strewn about drenched in red with _bones and **guts**_ in view for all to see. I've never ever seen something like this. And I wish I hadn't.

My hands flew to my mouth in horror. God, _God_ it was awful. Why? Who would do something like this? _Why_ would someone do something like this?! And oh God the smell, I hadn't noticed before, holy shit the smell, I was gunna-

I fell to my knees and retched.

Numbly I felt Hughes hug me so I wouldn't see the body, but it was too late. It was etched in my mind, her numb eyes and her guts spilled out across the ground. I wanted to cry so bad. I _was_ crying. Why would Truth throw me here?! Why would it put me here in this awful, awful place?!

There was a thump, and a sudden cry of, "Mr. Elric!"

Hughes shifted and I could suddenly see a passed out Ed, sweat covering his forehead with a pained expression on his face. But why would he faint? He was so much more tough-skinned than I was, so why- oh no, his _mom_. He was thinking about that night.

"Get these two back to Shou Tucker's house," Hughes ordered two officers, who gave a shaky affirmative. He sighed, turning to me. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have brought you two here."

I didn't have the energy to reply.

* * *

"He has a small fever, but it should go down soon. Give him some time to rest and he'll feel better," Tucker told Al and I as he rested a bowl of water on the bedside.

"Thank you, Mr. Tucker," Al said, and Tucker smiled as he moved out of the room. Al let out a metallic sigh as he turned to Ed. "What happened?" he asked me.

"We saw a chopped up dead body," I replied quietly, dipping a rag in water to place on Ed's face. Al let out a quiet, ' _oh_ ,' and if I had the energy I would have chuckled.

We sat watching over Edward, and he tossed and turned, muttering words like, _'Mom, I'm sorry,_ ' and, ' _I didn't want this,_ '. Each mutter was a punch to the gut, because I knew I would have to ask so they could trust me, so there wouldn't be boundaries between us, but it didn't mean I had to enjoy it.

"Why is he saying that?" I choked out, refusing to look at Al.

Al tenses beside me and I try not to sigh in guilt. "I, uh..." he shifted, looking away. "Our mom died."

Though I expected it, it didn't hurt any less. "I'm so sorry," I muttered with genuine pain, clenching my jeans tightly as I washed Ed's forehead. Al sighed, and I bit my lip as I asked, "What does he mean when he says, I'm sorry?"

Al doesn't look at me.

I decide to make it somewhat easier on him. "...It's okay. You only had the best intentions." He turns to me in confusion, and I continue dabbing away on Ed's face. "You committed human transmutation, didn't you...?"

Al's armor tenses up, and he looks like he wants to run away as he asks quietly, "How did you know...?"

"I saw it in a book..." I say, which isn't exactly a lie. "About how it was taboo and there's no equivalent price. And... well mixed in with Ed's mutterings, his automail and the fact that you never take off that armor well..." I shrug, "it all just kinda added up."

He lets out a sound like a sob to make up for his lack of tears. "We just wanted to see her again..." he cries, and I tear up. Why was the world like this? Why did so many people have to go through so much pain?

"Al," I say, putting on my award winning smile. "It's okay. No one is blaming you. I'm not blaming you. Okay?" He sobs, and before I know it I've got a face full of metal and probably a few bruises, patting his back as he repeats his thank you's over and over again.

* * *

" _You_!"

"Yes, Ed?" I yawn, not looking up from my book on the spot in my bed. I hear his teeth grit and him storming up to me, and I smile. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"How did you know?" he growls and I slam my book closed.

"With my own genius and intellect, my dear Edward, I was merely able to put the pieces in place! Please, do hold your applause," I say dramatically, bowing. I spot Al in the doorway and I grin. "Now, while I do love a good audience to inspire, I was just in the middle of studying, and I must get back to it. Ta-ta!" I wave, and turn back to my book.

He points a finger in my face, which I swat away. "You better not tell anyone."

I snort. "Please, Edward. I'm an _amnesiac_ , what do you take me for?"

He huffs and tumbles down into the chair I used for my desk Tucker had been so gracious to lend, and remained silent as I continued on my reading. Though I had tried to portray being calm and collected, my eyes couldn't focus on the words from the amount I was _freaking out._

Ed continued to stay silent and I can actually feel his stare on my face which further prompts me to continue ignoring him lest I get a fist to my cheek. His leg is tapping up and down and I want to _physically scream_ when Al abandons me, closing the door. _Thanks for sentencing me to my death, Alphonse._

"Why aren't you disgusted?"

I scrunch up my face and give Ed the most incredulous face I can muster because _what the fuck_ , but I'm cut off when I catch Ed's genuinely confused face as he stares at the floor. He actually thinks I would be disgusted.

I sigh and close my book, preparing myself for yet another sappy one-on-one _(I've had a lot of those these past few days)_ , before resting my hand in my palms and turning to him. "Have I told you about my mom?" I hum.

Looking up, he raises an eyebrow. "No?"

I nod. "Well, for starters, I always call her ' _maman'_ , which is french for mom. She's compassionate and funny, even when she can be sarcastic," I smile when he chuckles. "She has red hair and freckles just like me, and she gives great hugs just like me too. She's a first grade teacher, she likes coffee, she can be grumpy, we make pizza on Fridays and I always tell her I love her." I swallow back the sudden lump in my throat thinking about maman because this is about _Edward, and not me_. "I love her a lot." _Nothing will change that_. "I miss her." _God do I miss her_. "And I can't imagine life without her." _I may have to_. "So believe me when I say I understand why you and Al tried it. _Believe me_ when I say I don't fault you for it either."

Seeing him grit his teeth and turn away makes my gut churn, so I let out a shaky exhale and tap his head. "Don't worry, pipsqueak, I don't hate you."

Despite the way he glares at me and growls, "Well I do," we both can't help but laugh anyway. He taps his leg as he stand up to leave, halting before the door. "Madison?" I hum in acknowledgement. He hesitates, before muttering, "Thank you," and leaving.

I run a hand through my hair, my nerves all of a sudden too shot to continue studying. So instead I reach over to turn the lamp off and dive under the blankets.

I won't admit that I cried myself to sleep.

* * *

I blink.

So does Edward.

I blink again.

"Holy _shit_ I did it!" I scream, jumping to my feet to do a little jig, beaming down at the tower of metal I had created. My _first_ alchemist reaction and I _succeeded_ and it was _beautiful_ and _I was going to **cry.**_

"Big sister said a bad word!" Nina cries from a top Al's shoulders, looking horrified at me causing me to slap my mouth as Ed howls _(I plead neither innocent nor guilty when he finds himself over on his side on the ground)._

"I'm so sorry Nina," I stutter as I wave my hands frantically to her frowning face. "Please don't be mad?"

She huffs as she turns away from me with a pout, refusing to even see to reason. "No! You said a bad word, which is bad! Daddy said never to say those words or you'd be in big trouble!"

I flush as both the brothers begin to snicker at me with glee because we all knew Tucker had some rather... _interesting_ punishments _(I shudder thinking about the hand-holding one)_. Frantically, I place my hands together as I cry, "Please Nina! I-I'll bake you brownies, how does that sound? Delicious, chocolaty goodness just _please don't tell your dad!"_

She peeks an eye open to me, her lips tugging up in a smile as she beams. "Yay! Okay, I won't tell daddy!" _Thank god, crisis averted_. Alexander barks as Nina begins cheering a top a laughing Alphonse as they begin to run around the yard.

A recovered Ed from his earlier tumble walks up beside me as I'm weeping from relief, grinning like the bastard he is. "You sure you don't wanna give up Alchemy for lying and bartering?" He lets out an oof as my elbow connects to his gut.

* * *

"Lean down, spread your legs apart. Stop being so tense."

I can't help the snort that escapes me, nor the mutter of, "That sounds so wrong."

Ed ends up kicking my legs out from under me, and though I'm wheezing on the ground, my chuckling of, " _Totally worth it,_ " makes him sigh.

* * *

"Madison?"

I look up groggily to the tired Nina as she clutches a teddy bear in her arms. Tears had been running down her face which makes me sit up immediately. "What's wrong, petite etoile?" I ask, rubbing my eyes to try and wake myself up.

Her lips pucker and wobble. "Scary dream."

I nod and pat my bed so she'll sit down beside me. She succeeds with a bit of difficulty, and before long I'm running my hands through her hair as I hum to calm her down. "Madison?" she calls out sleepy.

"Mmh?"

"Can I stay with you?"

Once upon a time I would have scowled and probably stuttered out some poor excuse so she wouldn't have. I hated kids. Nina, however, was different. She was sweet and endearing and she had wiggled her way into my heart. So I smiled, stuffling her with a hug that made her giggle as I said, "Of course, etoile."

* * *

"Madison, no!"

"Madison, _yes!_ "

"It says two caps not two cups you **_dolt_**!" Ed screams, tugging the sugar from my grasp as I frown, continuing to struggle against Al's hold on my arms.

"But _Ed_!" I whine, pointing to a happily oblivious Nina as she played with Alexander. "Look at her! She needs all the sugar she can get!"

"Are you sure the sugar is for her and not for you?' Al questions, making me glare up at him.

"Wow, Al. Real cold. I thought we were _friends_. How could you betray me like this?"

"Wait we need _milk?_!" Ed nearly shrieks, giving an incredulous glance to the recipe. "Why the hell do we need that accursed poison in the cookies?!"

"Because, Ed," I sing, pouring the milk into the batter despite his shrieking behind me. "Some foods actually need it. And you need it to grow!"

"Why you-"

"Besides, Ed!" Al chips in, ever the mediator. "Aunt Pinako's stew has milk in it!"

Ed huffs, turning his nose up in the air.

* * *

 _Block, evade, right arm, right leg, parry, right arm, block, jump, left leg, evade, parry, block, right arm, left arm, jump, evade, parry-_

In the recent months we've been at the Tucker household, these thoughts have become much more frequent in my mind the more spars Ed and I, occasionally Al share. It wasn't easy at first, and the bruises and cuts I've acquired from them prove that, but slowly I was able to go up against Ed better. I'm still no where _near_ where Ed is, but I'm definitely no pansy either.

 _If only Kate could see me now,_ I think to myself.

"Madison! Brother!"

Al's call distracts me and soon enough I find myself on my permanent home on the ground. I wheeze and glare at the hand Ed gives me, but nonetheless accept it.

"You're getting better," Ed says as I dust off my shorts. "But you keep leaving your left side exposed, and you rely too heavily on your right."

I roll my eyes, throwing my hands in the air. "I know, I know."

Al chuckles as he walks toward us, throwing us each a towel to which I'm grateful. I was sweating like a pig. "You're doing really well, Madison!" he cheers, causing me to smile in pride.

"This is why you're my favourite brother, Al," I sing, knocking on his chest plate, causing Ed to seethe next to me.

"I see you're all busy at work," Tucker says, announcing his presence, We smile and offer our greetings, which causes him to nod back. "Are you all ready for the exam today?" he asks, which sends a rush of nervousness flooding through me.

"As I'll ever be," I mutter, the brothers adding in their own two cents.

"Though the exam can be difficult, I have faith in your abilities," Tucker smiles, causing a flutter to appear in my chest at his praise.

Today was the day. The day where I would see if I had what it took to be Truth's little _puppet_. I would pass this exam, just you watch me. And I was going to get back home no matter how hard it got. I was going to do it, and I would succeed.

* * *

 **AN: _Scratches head, looks at update. Looks at chapter._ Did... did I update in three days?**

 **You bet I did!**

 **Okie-doki, so. This was mostly a filler chapter to establish Madison into the universe and for her to bond with the characters a bit more. Sorry that not a lot happened. Also! I felt that I should begin replying to reviews in case anyone had questions that I answered for someone else. These reviews also mean so much to me and replying makes me feel closer to you guys!**

* * *

 **Guest:**

 **Sorry, but I'm gonna have to take you up on that offer. I will defend Madison's honour!** (ง'̀-'́)ง

 **A fan:**

 **Unfortunately, no. Commander duck was a nickname Madison had given to me, and I'm also short as hell, so ;-;**

* * *

 **That's it for now! Until the next chapter!**

 **-Adios!**


	7. Chapter 7: Happiness and Sorrow

**DISCLAIMER: Don't own FMA. Don't have the creativity for it :/**

* * *

Standing in front of the testing building I would be residing in for the next five or so hours and eyeing all the hope-to-be's entering the building, I suddenly lost my nerve.

"Hey, yeah, so is there a way for me to go back to Tucker's?" I ask in a meek resigned voice, giving incredulous eyes to the determined brothers as I pointed at the building with a pale face. "Because I am regretting everything. More than usual."

" _No_ , Madison, we've talked about this. If we're going so are you," Ed growls, snatching my wrist in a firm hold when I attempt to leave.

I don't bother to hold back my in-human screech of terror as I attempt to tug away from Edward's hold, breaking into song, "Is it to late to apologize~."

Ed is too used to my antics to blink an eye.

"I will literally backhand you and screech assault if you do not unhand me you insignificantly small human ostrich."

 _This_ makes him look at me. "I don't get you sometimes, Madison," he growls under his breath with Al's firm hand on his shoulders, his fists shake at his sides. Awe, he was upset about my small comment.

I nod. "I've been told." Blowing a raspberry, I add, "I've _also_ been told I'm great at repressing my emotions and avoiding my problems," I warn. Not even seconds afterwards do I let my body go limp.

Ed scrambles to catch my my limp body as Al screams in distress, both in concern for me and the fact that multiple people have begun looking in our direction. Let it be known that I didn't regret anything. "Madison, _please_ go inside," Ed begs.

"I don't _wanna_ ," I whine, still slumped in Edward's arms while I gazed at the monstrosity of a building and all the adults and much more talented alchemists that entered it. "I don't want to walk in and face the inevitable disappointment of not passing and succumbing to the fate of an amnesiac with no future."

What I am faced with is the stunned silence I inflict on both Al and Ed. "You... you really think that?" Alphonse mutters.

I shrug. "I mean, it makes sense, as much as I hate it," I say, letting Ed help me to my feet. Brushing my pants off with a sigh, I add, "Everyone applying is so much more talented than I am. There's such a little chance of me actually passing I don't really know why I'm bothering to try."

My hiss makes both the Elric's look at me with their equivalent's of frowns. Ed steps closer to me, and when I think he goes to place a hand on my shoulder, he surprises me by slamming his hand on my head. "Ouch!" I complain, hands flying to my head as I glare at him heatedly. "What the holy _hell_ was that for you jerk?!"

His glare matches my own. "You're trying," he swings at my shoulder, which I barely dodge, "because," another swing, "you," my left side this time, "have," he tries to go for my face, "a goal!" I block his punch with my hand, heaving as I barely keep back his fist. Continuing to glare at me, he continues, "Why the hell would you _give that up_ just because you're getting cold feet?!"

Gritting my teeth and trying to ignore stares around us and Al's distress and constant begging for us to stop, I spit, "I'm not getting cold feet, Edward! I'm trying to be reasonable!"

"Well be reasonable by at least fucking _**trying**_ ," Ed hisses and I block another punch. It makes me pissed as I realize he's not using his full strength. _He's patronizing me._ "You spent all those months studying, determined that you would succeed and for what?! To give up right before you're there?!"

Tears stab my eyes at his words because they stung. "I'm not giving up," I try to growl, but it's hard when all that comes out is a sob.

He releases his fist, and smacks my head again, but I barely try to resist. "Then act like it," he orders, his eyes aflame.

I notice how they soften too.

Letting my arms drop to my sides, I turn so I won't look him in the eye so he won't see my shame. God, what was I doing? Ugh, he was right, _again_. I had gone through so much reading and bruises and all-nighters so I could get back home to feel my mom's hugs again or to be annoyed by my sister, joke with my dad, watch t.v with grandma, _laugh with Kate._ Why the hell did I suddenly let my insecurity take control of that? Why the hell was I letting it get the best of me?

I swat the tears away and with a large inhale, face the brothers. Al looks at me in concern while Ed has his arms crossed and has his ever-present annoyed face on, but the tapping of his feet show his own way of concern. Shaking my arms, I smile weakly at them. "Sorry, guys," I chuckle. "Don't know what got into me."

" _Finally_ ," Ed groans, turning so he can stalk towards the testing building. "Now that your meltdown is over, can we do the exam? _Some of us_ want to become state alchemists."

Al shakes his head while he criticizes Ed, and I can't help but laugh, feeling better as I follow the two into the building.

Five minutes later I feel the full extent of my embarrassment at my earlier meltdown as I twirl a pencil in my hand, gnawing my lip as more and more people enter the examination room. I scowl once I realize most of them are eyeing me with distaste and scrutiny. _Screw all you fuckers, I don't care what I said like, five minutes ago, I am acing this thing._

Five hours later, I'm exhausted, mentally drained, and just want to have something to eat and please dear god a _nap._

Ed and I are both staggering out of the building as Al trails behind us. I don't have the energy to brighten up when I see Nina standing outside beside Tucker, both anxiously awaiting.

"Big brothers, big sister! How did you do?" she asks, jumping up and down in excitement behind a restrained and barking Alexander.

I try to smile; its more of a grimace. "I didn't finish all of the questions, but I spent a lot of time with the formula's and going in depth, so hopefully that'll score me some good points?"

"I didn't finish like Madison, but I was pretty close," Alphonse added with a sigh of disappointment.

"I finished but my hand feels like jelly and its cramping like hell," Ed groans, hopping into Tucker's car before Al and I do.

Tucker laughs as he sits in the front. I smile down as Nina hops on my lap with a giggle. "I don't doubt that you all did very well. It's not often you can find such prodigies like yourselves."

I blush at his praise. "While I agree with Ed and Al, I'm not a prodigy."

Ed's glare shoots dagger into my skull. "Do you have bruises on your head?"

I scowl, touching my head delicately. "Don't remind me."

We're just about to leave before an officer comes running towards the car, tapping on the window. It takes me a second to recognize him as Jean Havoc, cigarette lover and trusted soldier who worked under Mustang. He smiles when he looks at Ed, Al and I in the backseat. "Mind if you step out? The colonel would like a moment with you."

We turn to Tucker, as if asking for his permission, but he simply laughs. "Well, can't disobey the orders of the colonel. Go see him, we can wait here."

And so, we step out of the car (reluctantly) and follow Jean down a street just beside the testing building. I raise an eyebrow when he leads us to an alley, and when Ed spots Mustang in the shadows, he asks the question in my mind. "Why the hell did you ask to meet us here?"

Mustang raises an eyebrow toward the headstrong blond as he replies, "Would you rather the whole world aware of what you and your brother did?" Ed and Al both freeze and bow their heads.

"Excuse me, but I don't appreciate you talking to them that way."

When Mustang stares at me with cold eyes I shrink in on myself, screaming, _look what you did you idiot you just talked back to a military colonel oh god you're so **dead**_. "I assume she's aware of your... predicament?" Mustang asks.

Edward, having recovered, scowls back up at the colonel. "Yeah, so whatever you have to say you can spit it out."

Mustang nods, and holds up a stack of papers I recognize to be the exam I just spent five hours on. "This is Alphonse's exam. I've already looked it over, and from what I've seen it's most definitely up to the military's standards."

Alphonse is the one to speak up, "So what seems to be the problem, Colonel?" His nervous voice betrays his calm outward exterior. "Did I mess up...?"

"Quite the opposite," Mustang's cool voice replies. "In fact, if you had completed it I'm sure you would have nearly aced it."

"So why did you bring it up?" Ed growls, his fierce protectiveness for his brother coming apart at the seams.

Mustangs lets out a resigned sigh like his next words are a weight his shoulder's can barely handle. "Because while your brother passed with flying colours, I'm afraid it was a completely wasted effort." The three of us are stunned by his words, so he continues, "The next exam is an interview, and it has come to my attention that they will also be doing a physical with it to gauge how healthy your body will be, and if you can stand being in the military. I'm quite sure you have no intentions to reveal that your brother is hollow in that armor."

"No way!" Al shouts beside me, causing me to wince at both the loud noise and the disappointment in his tone. "I've spent a year studying so both my brother and I can become state alchemists! There's no way I'm going to give that up!"

"Save it, Al," Ed interrupts with a resigned sigh. Alphonse whips around to face him to exclaim his protest, but Ed merely smiles weakly. "Besides, one of us will be enough. You wouldn't want to be a state alchemist anyway." Looking down at the ground, I could see how he grit his teeth despite the fact that he was trying to keep himself together for Alphonse. "Remember what aunt Pinako said? You'll be a dog of the military. You'll have to ask how high when they say jump! It's best if you don't continue with the exam."

It's silent, and the weight of Al's disappointment and Ed's guilt weighs down heavily on all of us. I barely notice when Mustang turns to me. "I looked over your papers as well."

Gulping, I try to not squeak as I ask, "Well, should I resign to my fate as a homeless person or did I do okay?"

He smirks, flipping through what could very well determine my fate in this world. "Well, considering you only had a year to acquaint yourself with the world of alchemy, I'd have to say you exceeded my expectations." I let out a sigh of relief and let all the tension in my body let go as I slumped, before he stared at me with hard eyes. "But that won't be enough to impress the rest of them. You'll still have to do something truly extraordinary if you want to get this certification."

Rolling my eyes and letting my nervousness show by saying a sarcastic, "No pressure or anything," he waves us off so we can head back to Tucker's car.

As we're entering and trying not to let Nina aware of how much Mustang's conversation had affected us, the man in question tapped on the window. "The state wants you to know your assessment day is coming up soon, Tucker. You better impress them."

I can't explain it, but seeing the way Tucker's knuckles turned white around the steering wheel and how his glasses tinted in the light, a cold shiver went up my spine and my heart to drop down into my stomach.

"Yes, colonel. I am aware."

Mustang waves us off as the car starts and I sigh in relief. "Is it just me, or does he just emit an aura of, 'Obey me or I'll singe your flesh,' or something?" I joke, trying to ease the tension in the car.

Ed snorts as he looks out the window, mouth obscured by his glove. Ah. He was really upset, not that I could blame him. "What did he mean by assessment day, mister Tucker?" Al asked.

Coughing, Tucker continued looking at the road, glancing only briefly at Nina who had curled up on both Ed and mine's lap. "Well, every year the state will asses what accomplishments you've done through the months." He smiled wryly, pushing up his glasses. "Unfortunately, last year I didn't get a very good assessment." The three of us tenses up nervously as Tucker's voice hitched. "I tried so hard to get in, so I can't afford to lose my certification."

Ed perked up. "Didn't you transmute a talking chimera?" he asked, his voice betraying his curiosity.

"Ah, yes... that was two years ago," Tucker replied, delicately touching his state watch. "Before I was a state alchemist, my family and I were very poor, you see. My wife couldn't take it anymore and left us. Eventually, I used my grief of her absence to transmute a talking chimera."

"What did it say?" Alphonse inquired, his own interest piqued, making me chuckle. These boy and their insatiable curiosity.

Tucker looked into the mirror to look at us, and I nearly jumped in my seat when his eyes met mine. They were... I couldn't describe them but the most I could come up with was...

Gleeful.

"It only said three words," Tucker finally replied as he ripped his gaze from mine to my immense relief. However, his next sentence had be startled in my tracks.

"I want to die."

I gulped, heart leaping in my throat when the tips of Tucker's mouth curled upwards. I didn't know why, but the way he smiled as he talked about the chimera was chilling me to my core. It was as if the chimera had excited the man and... intrigued him. I tried to avoid his gaze, but his caught my eyes in the mirror once again, and my grip on Nina's hand tightened at the way his eyes shined.

* * *

"Sloane, Madison."

I tried to ignore the many stares and glares people threw my way as I stood to head into the interview room. Ed had gone before me, so I was all alone for this examination.

I found myself seated on a three-legged chair (Al told me this story once, a symbol of strength and balance, he had said, so I trusted him and sat down), facing a table of multiple alchemists, and one man who I assumed to be the Fuhrer. Mustang was there too, smirking as if to asses me, but I wouldn't let his gaze get to me.

"Why do you want to become a state alchemist?"

The question had me stop. I had never really questioned my decision before now, it had just seemed like the right choice of path. But now as the question was given to me I found myself asking why.

The imagine of my home floated into my mind. The image of my family who had been distant but nonetheless kind, of my friends that I would laugh and joke with at school, of my three dogs and my cat, of my messy room with all it's books. I wanted to see it again. I wanted to feel and touch and smell it all again.

"I want to become a state alchemist because..." the sentence had come to me naturally and my eyes met the Fuhrer, nails digging into my jeans, "because I have a home I want to protect. Because I have a life I want to live to the fullest, because I want to be strong for those I care about."

My answer made my chest fill with pride.

* * *

Whelp, here we were. The practical exam.

Alphonse, Nina and Alexander had come to see us off and to cheer us on from the background. Though Al was still upset about not being able to apply anymore, he had simply told his brother, _"Become a state alchemist for the both of us."_

"Well, we're off now," I wheezed, barely containing my anxiety. Ed nodded and took the lead into the building as I followed him.

"Wait, not yet!"

We turn to face Nina who had called out to us as we noticed she had her hands behind her back. She hopped from foot to foot anxiously and seemed to look to Alphonse for guidance, who merely nodded his head to us. She smiled, and held up to papers for us.

Tentatively, I grabbed the one she had offered me and unraveled it only to barely contain a gasp of surprise. It was a drawing. Well, a very crude and not well done drawing, but a drawing nonetheless of the four of us with Alexander and in the middle had a transmutation circle.

I tried not to cry when I saw nearly un-intelligible writing at the bottom of the page that read, "For big sis, who maks prety draings for me. Lov Nina."

"They're to help you get your wish!" Nina laughed cheerfully.

I smiled, kneeling down so I could pat her head. "Thank you, etoile. These are amazing." She giggled as Edward added in his own thanks causing me to smirk at him when I noticed his distinctly wet eyes.

"Good luck!" Alphonse shouted as we entered the building.

We found ourselves outdoors with other candidates staring at the large lot of land with trees, water, rocks, ice and other materials surrounding it. "We have collected an impressive amount of materials for you to demonstrate your alchemy. If we find what you have created to be merely satisfactory, you will not pass. So impress us!" the Fuhrer told us joyfully despite the suddenly nauseated contestants before him.

"Oh yeah, no pressure, just impress a large amount of professionals, no biggie," I muttered, causing Ed beside me to snort despite his pale face.

"Begin!"

Barely even three seconds after the words had fallen from Mustang's lips did a man run forward with chalk in hand. Quickly, he had drawn a decent sized circle in the dirt before clapping his hands and slamming them down.

I'd never get tired at the sight of alchemy. The pure raw energy that would come forth and the electrical charge that would be created from it was always fascinating to me. You could physically feel the energy of nature and the balance of the elements being shifted into your imagine was amazing.

The man had sprouted a tower from the ground causing talks and gasps of awe. I was certainly impressed with the design, detail and sheer size of it until I noticed he was barely able to sit up.

"You can't get tired after making a transmutation!" Ed scoffed, shaking his head. He yelped when a man shoved him as he made his way to the trees.

"Out of my way, brat. I'll show you why someone as little as you shouldn't be here," the man boasted, throwing water and some logs onto a sheet that had a circle he had drawn onto.

"Watch it, Ed," I warned to the steaming blond. "Not surrounded by soldiers with guns."

The man clapped his hands and once the transmutation had ended, a large paper blimp began to rize into the sky.

"A paper blimp huh," Ed stared in awe, completely transfixed. "He must be strong."

I smiled. "Using the hydrogen from the water was pretty impressive..." My eyes widened. Wait, I remembered something from home, something important about blimps and hydrogen. It was dangerous, I think? Since hydrogen was reactive that meant it was...

"Flammable," I said, making Ed turn to me. I didn't reply to his question as I instead turned around, shouting in distress, "Everyone, move! It's dangerous!"

Many scoffed at me making my teeth grit. "It's gunna explode, listen to me!"

Ed, realizing what I had, begun to shout, "It's flammable, and with this much alchemic reactions it'll explode!"

What do you know, a second later, my prediction came true.

The blimp exploded in a brilliant flash of light causing screams and panic. The blimp had slammed into the tower in its wake, and more screams erupted when rocks and debris began to fall.

Before I had realized it, my hands had clapped together and slammed against the ground, the equations and elements rushing though my head and the thought of how desperately I needed to save these people.

Brilliant red flashes of alchemic energy blinded my vision, the beautiful streaks of red almost calming and inviting and freeing. It felt so natural for this power to sweep through my hands and into the ground, bringing my vision to life.

A large blockade of solid metal had erupted from the ground, protecting the people that had no way to protect themselves. The debris had no way to penetrate the wall and simply broke apart upon impact.

Ed had rushed into action as the tower begun to fall upon the screaming man who was too exhausted to move. His hands slammed against the crashing tower, and with a flash of blue energy that nearly blinded my vision, the tower had begun to fall in delicate flower petals.

Falling onto my rear in relief it took my nearly five seconds for my eyes to go wide and stare at my hands in disbelief. I had... I had done alchemy without a transmutation circle! Like Ed! But how...?

Oh yeah. Gate. Duh.

"I believe we have found our two state alchemists."

A hand obscured my vision and I followed it up to the kind eyes of Fuhrer Bradley before the weight of his words hit me.

"You mean...? I whispered, accepting his hand to stand up.

He laughed joyfully. "Congratulations, miss Sloan. You've passed!"

Heading outside to meet up with the others was almost like a daze as the Fuhrer's words kept repeating in my head. ' _You've passed_.' It was almost like a dream! I had done it! I was a state alchemist! Like _Edward Elric_! Me!

"How'd it go, guys?" Alphonse asked anxiously, Nina on his shoulders.

Edward grinned widely. "Guess who are both state alchemists!?"

They gasped before laughing. "Yay, yay! You did it!" Nina proudly exclaimed causing me to chuckle happily as she clapped her hands.

Edward smiled up at her before staring seriously at Al. "I promise, Al," he began, holding out a fist. "I'm going to get your body back. I'm going to fix what I did." Alphonse chuckled, before offering his own fist to the older brother. It was a sweet sight to see the two brothers so close and caring towards each other.

"I had no doubts you two would pass."

Tucker walked forward from behind Alphonse, eyes glinting as he smiled. Ed grinned proudly sticking out his chest at the praise.

"We have to head to Mustang's office to get our certfication's and watches," I said, shifting from side to side as I eyed Jean Havoc who stood nearly twenty feet away to wait for us.

Alphonse popped up. "Can I go with you two?" he asked in excitement.

I shrugged as Edward shook his head. "I don't see why not," he replied.

Nina giggles gleefully. "I wanna come, I wanna come!"

Alphonse smiled up at her in reply but before he could say something, Tucker had placed a hand on his shoulder. "Actually, Nina. I was hoping you could come home. Why don't we play together today?" he suggested smiling up at his daughter.

Nina's face brightened up like the sun at the prostpect of playing with her usually busy dad. "You mean it?" she asked hopefully, and when he nodded, she cheered delightfully at a barking Alexander. "Did you hear that? We're gunna play with daddy! Daddy's gunna play with us today!"

The three of us chuckled as she blabbed away happily in Tucker's arms while they walked away to his car. "It's nice to see her so happy," Alphonse commented, making Ed and I nod in agreement.

"Whelp," Ed stated, twirling on his foot. "Let's get this show on the road. I want to start researching as soon as we can!"

I hid my yawn behind my hand. "And I want to take a nap," I replied tiredly.

"You always want a nap," he snorted ignoring, my glare.

We followed an excited Jean all the way to Mustang's office. I tried to ignore the way officers and soldiers whispered and stared at Ed and I as we walked passed them in amusement, as if they couldn't believe we had passed and it was all some sort of fluke. Instead of letting it get to me, I stuck my nose high in the air to fake confidence.

"He's waiting inside for the two of you," Jean said, pointing at the door that lead to Mustang's office. I gulped and tried to contain my squeal at seeing Riza Hawkeye and all the other people that made up Mustang's team. It was amazing to see them in the flesh and I still couldn't get over meeting characters from the anime. "Unfortunately, your brother will have to wait outside."

Alphonse nodded in understanding and sat down, and while Ed seemed a little annoyed he let it pass.

"Good luck," Riza nodded, causing me to nod in barely contained excitement.

Edward was the one to open the door, and soon we both stood before the colonel. He had two folders with a watch placed on each, which he handed to us. I tried to contain my groan of displeasure at seeing my utterly awful picture, but I tried to ignore it as I read the ridiculously professional papers.

"The Fuhrer was completely impressed with the both of you," Roy said, his chin placed on his intertwined hands. "Disclosed inside those folders you will find your certifications, and the written approval by the state that will allow you access to many research projects and materials."

"Does this mean that by the state we're considered legal adults?" Edward asked, near excitement in his voice. Ah yes, I think I remembered him mentioning his displeasure at having Pinako be his legal guardian for both Al and him despite also having to take care of Winry. He had hoped to relieve her of that by becoming a state alchemist.

Mustang nodded. "Indeed you will. That means that by law you will be in charge of your brother and you have a lot more freedom than most citizens do."

I snorted. "The state made a mistake giving me that freedom." Mustang smirked at my sarcasm while Ed barely contained his snickers.

"Along with your certification, the state has assigned you both your title. It will be printed down at the bottom of the last page." With growing anxiety and excitement, I quickly flipped to the last paged and let my eyes trail down.

 _'The Crimson Alchemist.'_

"The Crimson Alchemist?" I asked in confusion, raising an eyebrow at the flame alchemist.

He closed his eyes in amusement. "It seems they took inspiration from your alchemic energy, as well as your rather... bright hair." I sort of felt like glaring at my offending hair, but 'The Crimson Alchemist,' was a pretty bad-ass title, so I didn't complain.

"Fullmetal Alchemist?" Ed read in growing excitement. He chuckled. "Fits me to a T." I could barely contain my grin at finally hearing that name. God it was so familiar.

"Indeed," Mustang smirked. "Now, we'll give you the night to get acquainted to your title, so you can head back to Tucker's for now. We'll have a car ready for you two."

* * *

There's only been one time in my life where I had misjudged a situation to the point where I had wanted to black out and forget the world existed. Where I had shut down and screamed in my head until my temples throbbed and stung and _hurt_.

Now was one of those times.

The moment I had stepped through the door of the home we had stayed in for the past year, a feeling had sunk down into the bottom of my gut and a lump got stuck in my throat.

But I had ignored it. That was probably my worst mistake.

Al's voice had rung through the house, happy and chipper and excited. But somehow, it was hazy and clouded in my ears. Once again, I had ignored it.

Once the entire house had been searched we saw the door to Tucker's lab creak. My mouth had opened to tell Edward and Alphonse, to warn them of the sinking feeling in my gut but I crushed it down. _I ignored it._

I hadn't even realized time had passed before Edward had crouched down in front of me, admiring the chimera Tucker had created, Tucker had _transmuted_. Ed was amazed and transfixed, but something in me said it was _wrong_.

It was only when the chimera's eyes had met my own and whispered the word I had used too often, the word I would whisper and chuckle out, the word _Nina_ was, 'Etoile,' did my mouth let out a heavy sob as it came crushing back. Images and words and pain came flowing through my head as I stumbled backward, eyes never breaking contact as I slid down the wall in my daze.

I heard Ed yelling. I heard his scream of anguish and pain and Al try to console him, Tucker laugh hysterically, but I couldn't register it. The wall was cold and water was suffocating me, submerging me but not letting me drown. Fire scorched my throat and eyes but didn't burn me.

It hurt but there wasn't physical pain. It hurt but I couldn't do anything because that was Nina. That was the sweet little girl that I had called, 'etoile,' and she's _gone._

I never liked kids, and I don't think I will. But Nina had stumbled her way into my heart and filled it with affection and love and I had _killed_ her.

Children are dangerous because you can't protect them. Because the moment you let your eyes off them they're gone and it's your fault because it's your resbonsibility. You're supposed to raise and cherish them and protect them from the horrors of the worse but you can't.

I hadn't realized before its too late to fix anything.

I couldn't remember in time and now she's gone. Truth had taken my only weapon in this world I could have used to protect her but I didn't _remember._ If I had just remembered a moment sooner she would be here with us, happy and laughing and care-free, the way a child should be. But I had failed her.

I could have saved her. But I didn't.

Ed couldn't have saved a little girl if he had tried. I could have though, if I _had_ tried.

I killed Nina. And I have never hated myself more in my entire life with that realization.

* * *

 **AN: All aboard the angst train! Sorry if it felt rushed, but I really wanted to get this out this week, so here it is! It's also the most longest chapter yet, so hurray!**

 **Prepare to cry next chapter, as it will have a lot of angst! Prepare yourself! :3**

* * *

 **Internal_Nightmare:**

 **I'm glad to know you enjoyed it! Hopefully this chapter wasn't too sad or serious for you**

 **Lizyeh2000:**

 **Thank you for saying so, and here it is!**

* * *

 **That's it for now, until next time!**

 **-Adios!**


	8. Chapter 8: Tension

**DISCLAIMER: Nope, don't own FMA**

* * *

(-Edward-)

Edward hated the rain.

Even when he was younger, the rain had always bothered him. It would prevent him and Al from playing outside because their mother refused to wash their muddy clothes and in their little village in the countryside, getting a cold meant being miserable for two to four days without medication. Not to mention, his port would ache and phantom pains to tear up his arm.

Another reason he hated rain was because it was always a bad omen for death and loss.

So it was safe to say as the rain soaked him to the bone and trailed down his back, head bowed into his knees, he felt miserable.

"Tucker will be facing martial judgement," Mustang spoke, walking down the steps beside the three alchemists. Edward ignored him, however, too caught up in his grief to honestly give a damn. "I expect you three to comb through his research for anything that may be of use, and to not speak a word of this. Is that clear?"

The words caused Edward's head to snap up and eyes to shine with fury as he glared at Mustang. "So you're covering it all up?! You're not going to let people know about it?!"

Mustang's glare matched his own. "Fullmetal, if the public were to know the military had such an alchemist at their disposal, do you honestly believe they would bat an eye?" Turning around he began to walk away. "No, people would cause an uproar. One we certainly don't need."

"Nina." Edward, Alphonse and Mustang's eyes trailed over to where the lone redhead sat, dull hazel gaze facing the ground. "What'll happen to Nina?"

Mustang ignored the three teens as he answered, "She'll be moved to a lab to be closely monitored." He barely flinched when both the Elric's jumped up in fury, shouting their protests. "Hawkeye, let's go." The blond lieutenant nodded mutely and followed after him to their vehicle, casting only one mournful gaze to the three as they left.

In the corner of his eye did Edward spot some soldiers hauling a whining Nina onto a truck. "Like hell I'm letting them treat her like some sort of _lab-rat_ ," he spat, clapping his hands and slamming them down onto the ground. The truck which had been taking off shook, before falling onto it's side. Shouts of soldiers escalated, and a barking Nina jumped from the truck.

"Nina!" Alphonse exclaimed desperately. The chimera stopped to look back at them hesitantly, before bolting down the road.

Edward didn't need any prompting to chase after her.

He didn't stop to wait for Al or Madison, since he could hear two sets of footsteps trailing behind him. He ignored the rain, ignored the huffs behind him and the way his chest clenched uncomfortably in familiar guilt.

It was merely five minutes later, after they heard the howl of pain did they stand in front of an alleyway, eyes staring up in horror at the silhouette made of blood on the wall that so closely resembled Nina.

It took all of his willpower to keep his legs from giving out from under him, but Madison wasn't so lucky. Crashing to the ground that would bound to leave her with bruises, she let out a wailing sob from her throat, the sound crushing the hearts of both brothers.

His nails dug through his gloves as he let out an anguished cough. Dammit. How could he let this happen? He saw her not two hours ago. He saw her laughing and smiling and _there_. And he let her leave with that _monster_. He saw her holding his hand and he had just abandoned her and left her to die. He had left her to die _**twice**_. What the hell kind of alchemist was he if he couldn't even save one little girl?! Why the hell couldn't he save _anyone?_! Why did he let the people he loved get hurt and killed?! What was the point of having his alchemy if he couldn't _save_ anyone with it?!

"N-no... t-this is my fault..." Madison's shaky exhale fell on deaf ears, for the two brothers had the same thought rushing through their heads. However, the next words were not quite so simular to them, and once Edward heard them, his blood ran cold; "W-why didn't I remember? Why didn't I save her?"

Madison didn't realize her mistake until his head had snapped around to face her, his voice shaking with barely contained rage as he coolly hissed one word; " _What?_ "

Sputtering, Madison jumped to her feet, hands waving frantically. "N-no, I meant... I, uh," her hands were shaking at her sides, red hair sticking to her freckled face as she tried to get the words out. "Please, let me explain, I-"

"Explain _what,_ exactly," Edward growled, stomping forward to her, causing the girl to back up against the wall. He brushed off his brother's hand on his shoulder, his eyes never leaving Madison's terrified ones. "What do you mean, _'remember'?_ What the hell didn't you remember?!"

"I, uh, uh," Madison stuttered uselessly, lips trembling in fear as she breathed in quiet quick gasps. She couldn't get the words out, couldn't explain to him, couldn't give him an excuse as to why she had let Nina die. "Ed, please-"

"No, no!" he shouted, and in one quick swift motion her shirt was held tightly in his auto-mail fist, head thumping harshly against the hard brick wall. Edward paid no head to her whimpers, however, as his eyes shook with rage. "Do _not_ call me that. Explain, Madison! What the hell are you hiding from us?!"

Tears were flowing from her eyes, from fear, anger, grief and so many more emotions she couldn't name. She had killed Nina. It was her fault, she hadn't remembered, if only she had _remembered_. But she hadn't. She was stuck here, in a world she didn't know, full of strangers and danger and God she was so scared. He was going to abandon her, the only friends she had here, and she wanted to tell them so bad, wanted to tell someone but she _couldn't_. "Because, Edward!" she screamed, clawing at his hands uselessly, ignoring the way his eyes widened at her screech. "Because if I tell you I could kill someone else! Do you honestly think I wanted Nina dead?! Do you honestly think that if I could I would be here?!" She's letting out more than she should, she knows. She knows she shouldn't, that she could mess up and ruin everything, but she just doesn't _care_ anymore. "If I could leave I would in a heartbeat, but I'm _stuck_ here, Edward! And you're not _helping!"_

Madison is punching and kicking and _screaming_ , and doing everything in her power for him to just let her _go_. "Let me go, Edward Elric! Just..." sobbing uselessly, she bows her head, "just let me go..."

She doesn't expect him to.

She doesn't regret running.

They don't stop her.

* * *

(-Alphonse-)

When Alphonse had first met Madison, he had grown attached to her very quickly. Her smiles and wit immediately drew him in, and he knew she had done the same to his brother. However, through their shared year together, there was the smallest part of him, the tiniest inkling of suspicion that she had been hiding something. It was the way she had spoke of home, so fondly and sad. It reminded him of himself, in a way. It was the way she would watch them occasionally, as if her eyes couldn't quite believed them to be standing right in front of her, or the way she would look at the world around her like she didn't belong.

They're barely listening as Mustang lists off the address they're to stay in when in central. Military perks, or something, he had said. Alphonse is the one to grab the slip of paper with the number on it that the colonel hands them, since Edward is sullenly brooding to his side.

"You're expected to keep it tidy, and pay rent every three months," Mustang lists off, bored. "Though with your earnings, I don't expect it will be much of a problem."

"Thank you, sir," Alphonse nods politely.

Mustang nods back, before raising an eyebrow at the still silent alchemist. "Is there a problem, Fullmetal? You're being more respectable than usual."

He huffs. "It's nothing," Edward growls.

Mustang ignores him, turning to the paperwork Hawkeye had forced him to finish. "Very well, dismissed." The two make to leave, before Mustang pipes up again, "Make sure Crimson hears of the new arrangements as well. You'll be sharing."

Edward walks briskly out the door, scowling.

Alphonse tries to keep up with his fast past (not that it's hard), and watches over the angry blond's head. The confrontation with Madison after N-...Nina, had not gone well. It was shocking, watching the two people he was closest two look like that, one ready to tear the other's throat out while the latter looked terrified beyond hell and like they wanted to be anywhere but there.

A part of him was angry like his brother. Madison had kept something from them, for an entire year. An entire year of laughing, smiling and being together. She had known something would have happened to Nina, (somehow) and hadn't done anything, and yet...

Another part of him sympathized with her. She had been distraught when they had discovered the chimera that Nina had been turned into, and had genuinely thought it had been her fault. She had been destroyed by her death.

Her words of, ' _If I could leave I would in a heartbeat, but I'm stuck here, Edward,_ ' still rung through his head. He wanted to know what she meant by it. Stuck here? Sure, she had lost memories, but that didn't mean she was stuck.

Madison was _definitely_ hiding something, and Alphonse was dying to know what.

Arriving at the entrance to central command, Alphonse had perked up upon seeing the current girl in question. She looked worse for the wear, dark bags under her eyes, and a new set of clothes on than she had yesterday. She was staring down at the watch she had acquired merely 24 hours ago as she looked up at the large building of central command.

"Madison?" he spoke, ignoring the way Edward was shaking at his side.

Her head snapped up in fear, looking up at him. She sputtered, stepping back, eyes darting around like she was looking for some way of escape.

"Where were you last night?" he asking, placing a hand on Edward's shoulder when the boy tried to speak. Madison had been their friend. Even if she had hid something, a small part of him missed the way they had been laughing and carefree. So, he told himself that he still trusted her and believed if she wanted to tell them, she will in her own time.

Swallowing, she looks down at the watch once again. "I uh..." she spoke, her voice betraying her nervousness. "Stayed with the Hughes."

Nodding, he chuckled to signal he wasn't upset with her. She looked shocked, before smiling softly.

Edward hissed, pushing past her with his shoulder. "C'mon Al, let's go to the library." Madison watched him go with barely contained anger and sadness, rubbing the shoulder he had most likely bruised.

As Alphonse walked by her, he patted her head. She looked up at him under a curtain of red hair. "Don't worry, Madison, I still trust you," he whispered.

Lips trembling, Madison smiles shakily up at him. "Thank you, Al. It means more than you know."

He pats her head again, before following after his brother.

Now he had no doubts. Madison had no intention of hurting anyone, especially Nina. Even if she had been hiding something, it had to be because she didn't have a choice. Now only if he could get Edward to believe that.

* * *

(-Madison-)

It's not like I didn't expect it, but it doesn't mean it hurts any less.

With Edward declaring basically right to my face that he didn't trust me anymore, I had run away. Yeah, kinda not my best move, but I had to get away. I had to get away before he punched me, or I messed up and said something I shouldn't. I just... needed to be alone.

The Hughes had been kind enough to let me in when they had opened the door to see me sobbing, drenched and shivering. I had spent a solid hour screaming at God knows what, and after Gracia had given me a pair of clothes I had immediately passed out on their spare bed, letting the blissful release of dreamland take me over.

Nina's face haunted me, however. Never before had I felt such an immense sense of guilt. I had let her die, and I didn't save her. My dreams had been filled with the image of her laughing and smiling before turning into the beast she had become, only asking why I had left her to die. Nina could have lived a carefree, happy life like every other little girl should, but that wasn't what happened.

Edward was right about me. Alphonse's words at the front of central helped, but it didn't mean he changed my mind.

I was resigning.

Yup, look at me, Madison Sloane. One of the youngest state alchemists ever, and I'm resigning a day after being accepted. Who was I kidding, anyway? Did I honestly expect to get anywhere? Honestly Truth should have picked someone else for this stupid thing.

The sound of chatter and talking filled the cafeteria that I was residing in until Mustang returned. Apparently he had some sort of meeting or something, so until then I was to stay here and munch on crackers.

"Isn't she the cutest?"

Sighing, I pushed around the potatoes on my plate that the chef had given me, smiling wryly at the gushing man. "Yes, Hughes."

"And look at this one, already looking like her mother. I'll have to be protecting her from possible suitors anytime soon now!" Hughes looked angry at even the thought of his little girl being taken from him by someone, and I sighed as I slammed my forehead on the cool table when he went into a rant about buying more guns and hand-knifes to start teaching her with.

"One little mistake doesn't define you, you know."

Lifting my head from the table and replacing it with my chin, I scowled. "Thanks for the life-lesson, Hughes."

Placing his photos back in his wallet, he rests his chin of his crossed fingers. "I'm serious, Madison," I scowl at the use of my full name, "You have the working of serious talent, and I don't want you to throw that all away."

 _'Ha serious talent my ass,'_ I snort to myself. The only reason I was picked was because stupid Truth had taken me from my own world and the only way to do that was to pass through the gate. It wasn't talent or anything, just circumstance.

However, Hughes didn't know that, so instead I nodded and bit down into a piece of bread before shuddering at it. Dammit, I did it again. I _hate_ bread.

I was about to ask see more pictures of Elicia to change the topic before I registered the thump of someone sitting beside me. I froze, catching the sight of red and yellow out of the corner of my eye and knowing only one person in the military with those kind of colours; Edward.

"Hughes, is there anyway the person who killed Nina was that serial killer you told us about a few months ago?" he asked, completely ignoring my existence.

Hughes frowned at the question, shaking his head. "No, that killer chops up his victims in separate pieces." We shuddered as we imagined the body we had seen, mangled and broken beyond repair. "The way Nina was killed... it was like she had been blown apart by the inside."

Murmuring, I added, "Like someone had deconstructed her..."

The both of them tightened their jaws at my words, but Edward continued to ignore me. "Has there been any new leads?" he asked.

Hughes shook his head. "Nothing. He kills his victims, then completely vanishes. We're absolutely confused by how quickly he kills them and disappears."

"Have you considered he may kill them someplace else?" Edward questioned, stealing my food since I wasn't eating it.

"Yup, awhile ago. We've been searching all cars entering and leaving the city but so far we've found absolutely nothing. We're at a loss."

It was like a puzzle, one that I couldn't solve. I scowled, realizing that if Truth hadn't taken my memories I could have stopped this killer from destroying more lives, but because I was too goddamn weak I couldn't do anything.

Unaware to my fists tightening at my pants, Hughes stood up. "Well, I best be on my way. This killer isn't giving me a break and if I want to get home then I need to start working." Giving us a lazy salute, he left.

Silence ensued, in which Edward coldly flipped the pages of his book while munching on the food quietly. I fidgeted, all too aware of the tension created between us. I only wished I had something to ignore him with, like my ipod but low and behold, Amestris didn't have that technology yet.

Eventually, I couldn't take it anymore and I slammed my hands down as I stood up, making him jump beside me. Shaking, I choked out, "You don't have to ignore me. Scream, yell, but don't just pretend I don't exist!"

He glares at me, slapping his book closed. "Well if you don't like it then _leave._ "

The cold words cause a lump to form in my throat, and my eyes to sting. I knew I messed up but... god it hurt.

"Fine," I whispered, hands shaking at my sides. "I will."

I stomped out of the cafeteria, ignoring whispers and stares of other military soldiers. Who cares about, ' _Youngest state alchemists,'_ or, ' _Talent,_ ' and **_everything_** I just didn't care about anymore.

Feeling a scream wanting to tear at my throat, I quickly made my way through the halls and ignoring the front exit. Rather than randomly scream in a populated area, I opted to leave through a side exit so I could rant my frustrations about the blond, the military, Tucker, Nina, this stupid situation, _Truth_ all the more quicker.

It's only when I'm finally outside, facing the back of a blond haired girl as she enters the back of an ice box, does it come rushing back to me.

 _Winry, Barry the Chopper, no evidence, disguise, ice-box, Edward going after them, pain, crying, Edward about to be killed-_

Before I know it, I'm rushing forward before Winry makes it completely inside, shouting, "Hey, you're Winry, aren't you?"

She turns, long blond hair whipping about her confused. "Um... yes? Do I know you?"

I snort, waving my hands nonchalantly, only too aware of the serial killer standing only right beside me, frowning in displeasure. _I need to act casual, I can't let him aware of the fact that I know._ "Nah, Edward and Alphonse told me about you!"

 _I could save her, I could save Edward. I could stop this from happening._ _ **I remembered.**_

Winry perks up, clasping her hands as she grins, "Oh! Ed and Al! Are they here?"

I nod, smiling and pointing to the building. "Yeah, Ed's in there stuffing his face. Wanna see him?" _C'mon, c'mon, say yes, say yes. We need to_ go _._

Jumping excitedly, she nods quickly. "Oh, yes, please!"

Nearly wheezing as I see Barry scowling, I start pushing her toward the building, all too aware that no one is around and that Barry is gripping his dress in displeasure. "Well, Ed mentioned he had wanted to see you, so why don't we go surprize him, hmm?"

Winry is in front of me, confused by the sudden pep in my step, but she still smiles and nods. "Sure! I can't wait to see his face!"

I smile, until a hand slams onto my shoulder.

"My, dear. I'm terribly sorry to bother you, but with my old age carrying these steaks for the chef can be terribly dreadful," Barry whispers with a cheerful voice, contradicting the knife against my lower-back, the cold steel chilling my bones. "Would you mind giving me a hand?"

"S-sure, not at all, miss," I reply, voice nearly betraying my fear. His hand tightens on my shoulder, and I smile at Winry. "Why don't you go ahead? Ed's really excited to see you."

She frowns, but nods. "Okay... see you soon?"

I nod, giving her a shaky smile. "O'course."

God, how I know it isn't true. Because I had a knife against my back and a serial killer's breath against my neck, breathing down my spine and preparing me for my impending death.

 _You saved Winry,_ I tell myself. _You did something_ right _._

Winry walks away, and with each step I feel another piece of me go with her. When's she's out of sight, it only takes a second for something to hit my head and for me to black out.

* * *

(-Edward-)

After Madison had stormed out, he huffed and tore at his food, his anger nearly tearing at the seams.

He had been ready to curse and yell at her, but after Alphonse had talked some sense into him, he elected to merely ignore her.

 _Boy did that work well,_ he snorted.

" _Brother, you need to think about Madison's side of things," Alphonse said, closing his book._

 _Edward scowled, gritting his teeth. "Why should I?" he retorted to his brother._

" _Think about it, Ed," Alphonse said, "if she had been with us for an entire year don't you think she would have said something?" Looking down, he added, "Maybe what she said is right. It's not that she wants to, she can't."_

" _Well why can't she?" Edward growled, anger and annoyance seeping through his voice._

" _I don't know, brother," Al responded calmly. "That's why we need to ask Madison herself." Edward huffed again, leaning back in his chair. "I... I don't think she wanted Nina to go through that, brother. If she had known something she would have stopped it."_

 _Edward would have loved to believe it. Madison had been his friend, they had been close in the year they spent together. But... she had hid something from them, hid something crucial and she expected him to just forget about it? What else did she know?_

" _It's not like we don't have our share of secrets," Alphonse continues. "I think we should give her a chance to explain herself."_

Edward had been going to, until she had stormed out. He sighed, rubbing at his temples. He wanted this whole mess to be over. He wanted things back they were before, laughing and smiling and carefree.

"Edward!"

Jumping up, he scanned his eyes until they saw a blond haired girl. "Winry?!" he shrieked in shock. He was about to demand why she was here, until he saw her terrified expression. Running over, he placed his hands on her shoulders. "Winry, Winry, what happened?"

"She-she," she stuttered, eyes shaking as recalled the events. "I was with this woman, then this red headed girl came over and said you were here." _Madison_ , he thought to himself. "B-But then the woman asked her to help unpack and I left and when I remembered I forgot my bag I- I."

Noticing her beginning to shake, he guided her out of the cafeteria. "Winry," he said seriously. "I need you to tell me what happened."

Her lips trembled, before she burst out, "I saw her get knocked out and kidnapped!" Edward's eyes widened, but Winry went on, "I hid and- and the woman grabbed her and placed her in the i-ice truck."

 _'Ice truck?'_ He thought, until it hit him.

Oh no.

"Winry, take me to where this happened," he demanded, panic seizing his veins.

 _'Please be okay.'_

* * *

(-Madison-)

It felt like I had been here for eternity.

Waking up to pains in my arms from low blood circulation by having them hanging above my head, and my mouth dry from the gag there had been the most terrifying way to wake up in existence. I panicked for a solid five seconds before the last thing that happened registered in my brain.

I then panicked some more.

Barry was humming some eerily cheery tune as he sharpened one of his knives, back turned to me. I tried to wiggle away, but it only sent a sharp pang through my arm and let a whimper escape my lips. Tears beginning to enter my eyes, I slumped against my bounds once I finally let the reality of the situation take over me.

I was going to die. Edward wasn't coming for me, I knew that for certain. He didn't care about me, no one in this world even _knew_ me. I was completely and utterly alone here.

It's been an entire year since I've been gone. A year of being stuck in a world not my own, surrounded by strangers and danger and alchemy. I wasn't cut out for this. I wasn't cut out for anything. Truth should have picked someone else because I was going to _die_ here and no one would miss me.

I missed my family. I missed my mom, with her bear hugs and sarcasm, my dad and his lame jokes, my sister with her singing, my grandma. I missed my two dogs and my fluffy cat. I missed Kate, and I missed my other friends. Hell, I missed school. I missed _normalcy._

I was going to die here and none of them would know I had been chopped up in bloody pieces. Hell, did they even know I exist anymore? Did Truth just erase who I was back home? Was I a nobody there too? Why me? Why was I picked? Why did I have to suffer through this, why did I have to watch people die, and mess up? I never asked for any of this, _I never asked to die!_

Barry had walked away, and for all I knew he was preparing my future grave. It took everything in my to not curse and scream and sob, but I simply didn't have it in me anymore.

However, when footsteps began approaching me, panic seized me and I begun to whimper against the gag, struggling in the bonds to escape, anything to get away. I didn't want to die, _I didn't want to die, **I didn't want to die!**_

"Shush, Madison, it's me!"

Eyes flying opening, I stared in shock as Edward neared me and begun to tug my gag down. When he begun to try and work on the bounds, I let out a pathetic, "E-Edward?"

He smiled weakly. "Don't worry, you're okay now."

I shook my head, confusion taking over my previous panic. "Why are you here?"

"I couldn't let you die!" he retorted, scowling as the bounds seemed to be too complicated to work on.

"But... I thought you hated me..." I murmured in confusion.

He hesitated, frowning, before replying, "I... I was confused and upset. I wanted to know what you were hiding from us, but... I trust you." Smiling, he looked me in the eyes with his golden ones. "I trust you, Madison."

Relief at his words spread through my body, hearing them dispelling so many of my fears and doubts that I barely noticed the figure behind him. It was only when they raised the bat did my eyes widen as I screamed a panic, "Ed!" He didn't turn fast enough, and when it struct him, I could only whimper uselessly as his body slumped to the floor.

"My, my, look what we have here," Barry purred, crazed eyes looking over Edward's prone form. "A stowaway. Well, we can't have that, can we?" I could only sob pathetically as he gave a chilling grin towards me.

* * *

 **AN: Eyy, sorry for taking two weeks. This chapter had been really hard to get out, and I had kinda been dreading putting Madison through all this. Sorry Madison!**

 **Also! I've been re-reading over previous chapters and cringed really hard, so I decided that I really need to edit them. So watch out for that!**

* * *

 **Lizyeh2000:**

 **At the moment Madison is currently 15, and so is Edward. Unfortunately I had to age Edward up a little bit, so he's not 12 when he takes the exam.**

* * *

 **That's it for now!**

 **-Adios!**


	9. Chapter 9: Trust

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own FMA, or any other related series.**

 **WARNING: MENTIONS OF GORE AND DEATH**

* * *

 **(-Ed-)**

It was a throbbing ache in the back of his skull and the sound of humming machinery that awoke Edward up from his slumber.

It took only a few seconds for him to realize three things. First; He was tied to a chair. Second; Cold ebbed at his limbs and bit his skin. Third; His automail arm was gone.

He groaned, nerves aflame and burning. It took him nearly a minute to open his eyes, a sharp pain shooting through them every time he tried. His sight was spotted with white dots, and he could hardly see what was in front of him.

When his mind finally caught up to him and what he had been doing before complete darkness had taken over, he croaked out, "Madison?!" in distress, scrambling up in the chair. The yell of concern got caught in his throat when he sighted the woman standing only five feet before him, humming a sickeningly sweet tune as she held the cleaver against the swirling stone, the edge gleaming in the light.

"Ah, I see our little alchemist is awake," the woman sung when she heard Edward's shout, twirling around to face him. Her grin was a sickening, malicious and bone-chilling one, and Edward couldn't help but try to back up in his chair. "Word is around town that the two of you can transmute without a circle." Holding up Edward's automail, she grinned sadistically as Ed grit his teeth. "So I had to take a few... precautions."

It was the woman's gaze to her side that alerted Edward to Madison's predicament, strung up awkwardly by both of her wrists with the only thing keeping her up being the small box under her feet. She had to stand on her toes to not strain her arms, but it didn't ease her pain in the least. Her face was stained by the tears she had shed for who knows how long, making her scarlet hair stick to her cheeks. Face blotchy and red, her eyes never left the woman as a gag obscured her whimpers.

"Oh, where are my manner's? Let me introduce myself." The woman chuckled, reaching a hand up to her hair and tugging down. Edward gasped in astonishment to realize her hair was actually a wig, and _she_ was actually a _he_. "My name is Barry," he sung, holding his arms out, "and this is my butcher shop."

"You're a man?" Edward growled out, gritting his teeth.

"Guilty as charged!" Barry snickered, walking towards Madison. The red-head whimpered, tugging on the chains in a pathetic attempt to escape the man's path. Flinching, she leaned away from him when his arm wrapped around her shoulders, pulling her close.

"Get away from her!" Edward shouted, fury leaking through his veins as he struggled around the chains around him, preventing him from doing anything and only watching as Madison struggled against Barry's hold.

Barry ignored the plea, however, stroking Madison's hair and grinning at her muffled screams from the gag. "You see, this little _pest_ ," he hissed, hand tugging painfully at her hair and causing more screams, "had stopped me from having my desired kill today." Edward blearily realized he must have been talking about Winry. Unaware to Ed's thoughts Barry leaned ever so close towards Madison, breath warming up the skin of her face. She tried to lean away, struggling and only resulting to cause pain to shoot up her arms. As she whimpered pathetically, Barry continued, "So you're going to sit back and watch as I take my sweet, sweet time cutting her into little. Tiny. _Pieces_."

"You sick bastard!" Screaming wasn't helping Edward. Not when he was bound and utterly useless. He couldn't do much except stall Barry until help hopefully arrived. "Why have you been doing this? Killing all those woman?" he inquired, hoping that it would preoccupy the man to give them a few more minutes to spare.

The question seemed to throw Barry off, as he hesitated to think about it. "Why? Hmm, curious question." Laughing, he let go of Madison, to both of their utter relief. "I... suppose it began when I was in an argument with my wife. She just nagged and _nagged_ and **_nagged_**!" Edward flinched when Barry swung his knife down of the table harshly, resulting in a loud thud. "Without meaning to I, well chopped her to pieces. But after that I wanted more. I wanted to slice more nagging woman up. Wanting to watch their skin tear under my knife. Wanted the world to watch."

Scoffing, Edward huffed, "Why would you kill someone for such a ridiculous reason?!"

"Why? Why?!" Barry whirled around, freezing Edward in place when he caught the gleeful glint in his eyes. "Because I can! Because I love seeing people reduced to their basic decency, because I love knowing that I was the one in control, that I could take someone out of this world and no one could stop me!" With each word Barry strides closer, eyes piercing through him. Ed instinctively tried to scoot backwards but it was useless. He couldn't fight, he couldn't defend himself, he couldn't do _anything_.

"Stay back!" The demand was out of his lips before he could register it, and as soon as it was uttered Edward was bewildered by the pathetic whine that he had spoke.

Barry halted before him, so close Edward could nearly taste the blood-lust teaming off him in waves. "People kill others every day. Men claim to have morals but when the situation calls for it they kill in the most brutal fashion. Why do you think that is?"

"How should I know?" Edward tried to snap back, but even he could heard the shakiness in his voice.

In a second, the knife sliced through his shoulder.

The pain didn't register at first, until a searing streak of lightning shot through his shoulder. He groaned, biting down on his teeth to hide how agonizing it was. He shook, the reality of the situation finally taking over. He might die.

No. No. He couldn't. He had a mission, dammit! He had to make up to Alphonse, he had to right his wrongs of what he had done. He couldn't die here!

"Course, most men always have that need, that call to kill," Barry continued, leaning down to look Edward directly into his eyes, unaware of the screw scratching against the chains. "But their society prevents them from doing so. Their own cowardice doesn't allow them to appease their primal instinct. Unlike State Alchemists," Barry snickered, patting Edward's head. "I once witnessed an entire town slaughtered, imagine that! Back then I didn't realize why that fountain of blood called to me!"

 _Mom. Dying. Hunger. Hope. Light. Blood. White. Groaning. Monster, not right, not human, it's wrong, **he did this.**_

"You're wrong!"

Barry shouted in alarm and stumbled backward, blocking his eyes from the harsh light of the rocky transmutation. He recovered far more quickly than Edward had anticipated, and his harsh angry eyes glared at him. Edward shouting in alarm, diving to the side mere moments before Barry's knife came whizzing down to where Edward had been moments before. Whipping his head around, he kicked his leg to grab the pole he transmuted the chain into, eyes widening when Barry turned to him. He stuck his automail leg up, halting Barry's knife before he was able to hit Ed.

"Emf!" Madison's muffled scream tore through the air, and it distracted Barry long enough for Edward to scramble up and run away.

The warehouse was large and like a labyrinth. Edward tore through it, bumping into large meat carcasses and pushing through them. Barry's joyful singing of, "Edward~ Where are you?~" followed him like a shadow, but he ignored it. His torn shoe tripped him up, though, and he fell to the floor with a shout. He huffed, whirling around, only to see Barry standing before him. Edward scrambled backward, trying to get away from Barry and his chilling grin, only to bump into the wall. Blindly in a panic, he swung his transmuted spear back in forth. It seemed Barry hadn't expected it, since the spear tore through the flesh of his hand, causing him to stumble back in pain. Edward wasted no time jumping up and running away.

Madison's muffled screams and shouts tore through him. He couldn't leave her alone, he had to get her out of here, they both had to get out of here and away, where it was safe. God, he had taken everything he had for granted. He missed his house, his home, his mom. He missed Alphonse.

He followed the light of where they had been before, and it was an absolute relief to see Madison still waiting. He ran up, reaching his lone hand to release her gag before working on releasing her arms from the chains. However, it was about as difficult as one would suspect. "C'mon, c'mon, c'mon," he hissed, succeeding on only one of them.

"Ed!" Madison shouted in alarm. He took it as a hint to dive to the side, which was smart since Barry missed him by mere inches. He knocked over the table, and he scrambled backwards, only to see his automail glinting in the light.

He snatched it before he fell backwards again onto the ground, looking up into Barry's furious eyes. Edward was frozen in fear, his limbs locked into place and refusing to listen to reason, all thoughts gone except for one thing; his looming death.

Madison was like a saving grace. She must have deconstructed the other chain in the time Barry had cornered him and leaped up onto Barry's back with a shout. He hissed in alarm, tugging at her arms and swinging around his knife wildly in his haste to wrestle her small body off him, but she held on tight and refusing to let go. Ed watched as they struggled, before glancing down at the automail in his hands, gulping down the fear of what he was about to do. Had to do.

With a large inhale, he plunged his automail into the port connecting to his nerves.

An agonizing scream tore through his throat, nerves shooting aflame as the machine connected to his port. The fear of the situation fled his mind when the only thing that replaced it was pain as he whimpered pathetically. It was quick, dodgy process and not at all in a professional environment, but it had to be done.

Blearily through the agonizing pain, he lifted his head and watched as Barry finally tousled Madison to the ground. She wheezed in pain from the harsh landing, before snapping her head up to the grinning Barry to meet his eyes before he plunged the blade down. Edward watched, uselessly, as the knife slid through her abdomen. She choked, looking down at the blade that was intruding her body through hazy eyes, as if she didn't quite understand why it was there or why it hurt as much as it did.

Her own scream echoed through the warehouse, as agonizing and painful as his had been. Barry slid the knife out, snickering like the mad-man he was when she tumbled to the ground in a heap, curling in on herself as she shivered and whimpered painfully. Concern and worry, but most of all _fear_ overwhelmed Ed as he gazed at the prone form of Madison. She naturally was a pale person, perhaps from staying indoors for too long, but this was _unnaturally_ pale. Her skin was grey, ashen, the blood drained from her face as a large puddle slowly grew under her instead. If he couldn't see her chest barely rising and falling, he would have thought that she was dead.

Barry continued chuckling, and from the corner of his eye, Ed saw the way Barry grinned gleefully at Madison's prone form, the way his knife gleamed in the dull light. He wanted to tear Madison apart, wanted to chop her into pieces.

He couldn't let that happen.

Grunting, he clumsily clapped his hands and extended his automail into a blunt blade. There wasn't much thought to what he was doing, just an idea in his head. All he knew was that even though he was upset with her, beyond frustrated that she hadn't trusted him, he didn't want her to die. He didn't want Barry to kill her, he didn't want her gone. So when Barry raises his cleaver to slice her skin, Edward rushes forward and protects her body with her own. The cleaver strikes his automail, and even though Edward had stopped Barry's attack on Madison, the man doesn't halt his advances. Blow after blow after blow strikes his arms, small cuts slowly raining upon his skin. He barely notices them, adrenaline running through his veins as panic screams through his head. He doesn't want to die, _he doesn't want to die._

His elbow connects with Barry's knee, causing the man to topple over and the cleaver to skitter away from his hands. Edward doesn't even hesitate, doesn't think about his next action beyond, _'I can't die, I **won't** die,'_ as his blade descends upon Barry.

"Don't!"

Ed doesn't recognize the voice, doesn't even stop to think about the fact that Barry was in front of him. All he registered was that there was a hand on his shoulder, someone was behind him and he was going to die, he didn't want to die!

The clang of metal against metal struck the air. Edward blinks for a few seconds, having to take a second to realize this wasn't Barry. Glancing up, he takes in the emotionless face of armor that had been his companion for two years. Heart rising up into his throat, he chokes out a pathetic whisper of, "Al?"

"It'll take more than that to kill me, brother," Al gently breathes, placing a hand on his shoulder. Ed can only let out a sob, and he can't even hold back the tears making their way down his cheeks, nor the way he begins to curl in on himself. "Are you hurt?"

"I-uh..." Ed licks his lips, swallowing the lump that forms in his throat. "A little, and Madison..." Al glances to the body that Ed has yet to move away from. A small gasp leaves him, and he turns to a soldier (where had he come from? Edward didn't even notice) before asking for a medic. His hands are shaking, barely registering when someone takes Barry away. "I thought he was going to kill me," Ed lets out a hysterical sob, something between a laugh and a cry. "I thought we were going to die. I thought I was going to die here."

"I know, brother," Al whispers. "I know."

* * *

 **(-Madison-)**

It takes awhile for me to actually wake up. Bits flicker in every now and again between the darkness, with nurses and doctors coming in to poke and prod at me. Its similar to those old film reels, where the movie would play but a lot of the images were obscured by a black screen. Most of it is all blurry, and I'm out of it again until the next time I'm awoken.

I'm not even sure how much time has passed before I wake up, still a little weary, but mostly coherent. The room I awake to is small, only the bed I lay in, a small table to the side of it and a few chairs placed against the wall. I have to blink a few times, my sense of time all out of whack before deciding it must be early morning or late at night from the nonexistent light coming from the window.

My limbs feel heavy, and it takes some time to move my fingers even a bit. I'm frustrated by the time I can move my hand, and even then it takes a bit. A scoff escapes my lips as I lean back against the pillows, thinking of what Ed would say to my weakness right now.

A sudden rush of images fill my head, forcing a gasp from me as I'm hit with the wave. Heart pounding faster and faster, adrenaline filling my veins as I recall the events, the reason why I'm in this room. My hands are pushing down my blanket without my control, pushing away the fabric of my hospital nightgown before I can even register why.

Breath catching in my throat, I stare at the rugged flesh there, with the cris-cross of stitches. There's a sob that wants to be let out, but I swallow it down and roughly pull the blankets back up. Tears sting at my eyes and threaten to fall down my cheeks, but I blink them away.

 _'Don't think about it_ ,' I say to myself. _'You're gone. He's gone. You aren't going to die.'_ Yet even with those thoughts running through my head, my heart refuses to stop pounding. The hairs on my arms are standing up, as if I expect Barry to come tearing down the door to kill me, even as I keep telling myself that he won't.

It feels like hours, or perhaps minutes pass when someone finally enters the room. I have to keep myself from jumping or for a scream to tear from my throat, because its obvious this is a doctor only trying to help. She's holding a clipboard, and she startles when she see's me. "Oh!" She smiles, pushing back her glasses. "You're awake." I only nod, not really in the mood to reply to her. My throat hurts from lack of use and screaming back in the butcher shop. Thankfully, the doctor notices and pops out of the room quickly only to return with a glass of water which I gulp down greedily. "How are you feeling?" she asks.

"Like I got stabbed," I reply dryly, watching her lips quirk up.

"Do you mind if I take a look at your stitches?" I shake my head which encourages her to push back my nightgown (thank god they gave me pants), and try not to be too embarrassed as she inspects my stomach. She pokes and prods at the healing patch of skin, muttering quick apologies when I hiss in pain. It feels like an eternity of her looking at my stab wound, and I amuse myself by imagining my friend's faces when I tell them about it when she finally finishes. She leans back and I smooth back the nightgown as she smiles at me. "Well, good news, your injury is healing quickly without any complications."

"The bad news?" I ask. A raised eyebrow is what I'm greeted with, so I continue, "You made it sound like there's bad news."

Chuckling, she shakes her head, "Nothing life threatening, I assure you. However, since you're healing nicely, that means your insistent visitors can come visit you now."

"Visitors?" I couldn't think of anyone who would want to visit me, 'cause anyone who would was either dead or upset with me.

The Doctor taps her lips, a thinking expression on her face. "I believe its a pair of brothers? A blond and one of them strangely in a suit of armor." She ignores my gaping mouth and begins to exit the room with the promise of returning with them. I try not to begin hyperventilating, but its hard with the threat of Edward tearing at my throat when he see's me. I remember when Ed had first appeared, when I had convinced myself I would never see the light of the sun ever again. He had said the words, ' _I trust you.'_ Had that been a fluke? Did he actually trust me, or was he merely there because he didn't want my death over his conscience? After all, he was put into that situation in the first place because of me.

Still, nothing prepares me for when they actually enter the room. God, its like I'm back on the train again, except this time instead of being overwhelmed in awe I'm hit with how totally screwed I am. Edward looks fine, despite a few cuts on his cheek that were pretty much healed over, a roll of gauze wrapped around one shoulder and bags under his eyes. I try to avoid looking at him and to focus on Al, who was the least aggressive of the two towards me.

There's a few moments of awkward silence, before Al breaks the tense atmosphere with an awkward, "How are you feeling?"

I shrug, wincing when it bothers my wound. "As good as I can be with a stab wound, I suppose." Al chuckles softly, but doesn't continue other than that. Shifting nervously, I wait for the bomb to drop, for the screaming and yelling to star; but it doesn't. Finally, I can't take it anymore as I huff, "So, what are you waiting for? Scream at me. Do whatever angry people do, say you'll curse my bloodline or something."

Edward raises an eyebrow. "Why would I be mad at someone who I literally went toe to toe with a serial killer for?" His comment causes an embarrassed flush to cross my cheeks, but most of all I'm only bewildered.

"Well, you didn't seem to think that the other day," I mutter, leaning up against the pillows.

Ed sighs, turning to Al who was only watching our exchange silently. "I... convinced Ed to listen to you," Al finally says. I turn my head to him as he shrugs. "Look, Madison. You were our friend, and we want to trust you, but..."

"You need to trust us, first," Ed grunts out, looking tired yet sad.

I want to tell them. Gods do I want to tell them. "Look, its-" I groan, tugging at my hair. "Its not that simple."

"Then make it simple for us to understand, Madison." I turn my stinging eyes to Edward, who has that determined yet soft look on his face. "You just have to tell us what happened." I shake my head.

This is exactly what I told myself I wouldn't do. I wouldn't make things complicated, I wouldn't cause any problems or change things, but... I wanted to go home. I wanted to see my mom again, my sister, my best friend. I was just Madison. I wasn't special, I couldn't do extraordinary things. Hell, I just got stabbed by a serial killer. Who was I kidding? I had no way of getting home by myself. I don't even think there was a way to get home without the philosopher's stone, which, wouldn't you know it, was the same exact thing they were searching for. I needed the brothers help to get home, and I couldn't do that without them trusting me.

"I was in a hospital like this before. When I was young." The two brothers look at me, Edward incredulously and, well... I couldn't really tell what Al was thinking. "I was maybe 6? I had a pneumonia, not that I knew what it was at the time. All I knew was that my mom was terrified and that I had trouble breathing without a mask. I didn't really know why she looked so heartbroken." I took a deep breath, closing my eyes. "I lied about not remembering where I'm from. I remember everything about my home, my family, my friends."

Al hums. "Why did you lie?"

I sigh. "Because... I knew you wouldn't believe me. Or something like that." I scoff. "Its kind of hard to even say it now because I know its gunna sound dumb." Fiddling nervously with my hair, I avoid their gaze. "You know the gate, right?"

"How do you-"

"I'm from the other side."

Its strange. I spent an entire year trying to hold back these words, yet they escaped from my lips with ease. It was like an entire weight had been lifted from my shoulders as I uttered them, and my tense shoulders seemed to loosen. Still, I refused to look at either of the brothers. Who was to say they would only look at me with disgust or disbelief? Would they even believe what I'm telling them? I would understand why, of course.

The sound of scraping wood entered my ears, and I turned to watch as Ed dragged a chair to the side of the bed. Sitting down, he stared at me with those intense eyes of his as he asked, "What do you mean?"

Biting my lip, I continued. "Okay, well, uh... I don't actually live here? I never have. I was born on a planet called Earth." I chuckled. "That kind of made me sound like an alien." Ed didn't look amused with my answer, so I shook my head as I said, "Okay- so I was never born in Amestris, or anywhere that you can travel to. I was at home when this giant eye opened up on my floor." It sucked reliving the memories, but since the Edward had a look of recognition I supposed it was helping him. "It dragged me in and what do you know? There's this blank figure looking at me. I was sure that I was dreaming, but then it told me I was gunna go to Amestris, I was dragged into the gate and I woke up on that train."

"You looked kinda off when we first met you," Al muttered quietly, and I nodded back at him.

"So you never lost any memories," Ed added in. I looked nervously at him, which caused him to narrow his eyes. "Or did you? When we found Nina's dead body," I tried not to flinch too much, "you said you should have remembered."

"About that," I sung, wringing my hands, "I didn't exactly lie about loosing memories. Just, not the memories you think I lost." Ed raised an eyebrow at me, slowly loosing his patience. Breathing out a sigh, I continued, "Okay, okay. This is gunna sound even more crazy but uh... I kind of know most of your lives? Its a story on my side that I've read," I rushed out meekly, quickly closing my eyes so I didn't have to gauge their reactions.

There was a silence, until Ed quietly said, "Can you repeat that...?"

"There's a story on my side of the gate called 'Fullmetal Alchemist', that I once read and thus caused me to know about your lives." I opened my eyes to turn to Edward sullenly, ignoring his bewildered look. "That's why I should have remembered Nina."

"... Then why didn't you?"

I faced Alphonse, and though I couldn't see his expression I felt my heart clench. "My toll for passing through the gate was my memories. Truth took them of future events. That's why I couldn't remember Nina in time to save her." Tears prickled my eyes, and I tightly blinked to hold them back. "Trust me, if I had remembered I would have done everything in my power to save her."

"So that's why you knew we did human transmutation, why Al is empty inside," Ed spoke, as if he finally understood some complex equation.

"That's why I was kidnapped and got stabbed," I said, gently prodding at my stomach. "I remembered that Winry was supposed to be kidnapped just in time to save her and take her place."

A harsh sound of a chair squeaking back hit me as Edward stood up. I looked up at him to be faced with his angry face. I only had enough time to briefly think, ' _What did I do this time?'_ before he was screaming, "Wait a second, you _let_ yourself be kidnapped?!"

"I didn't really have many options, Ed," I said, and when he went to open his mouth to rebut, I continued, "She only had like, five seconds, and I couldn't really find anyone in the area. Would you rather have someone who could decently fight back and _nothing_ to lose, or your childhood friend with family waiting for her?"

I didn't mean to make it sound as bitter as it came out, but what's done was done. To be fair, it was true. Winry had Pinako, and unlike her I didn't have anyone. I didn't even know if my family was waiting for me anymore. Its been a year. They could have forgotten all about me. Still, it was nice to hear Ed let out a small, "Thank you... For saving Winry." I tried shrugging it off, though.

Another silence faced us. I tried to keep my eyes open, but slowly exhaustion was creeping in, and my wound was starting to throb. It seemed the brothers sensed this, since they began to make their ways to the door. Edward hesitated, keeping a hand on the door, before turning to me to say gently, "Thank you for telling me the truth," before he leaves, closing the door behind him.

I feel a smile crossing my face before sleep surrounds me.

* * *

 **AN: Hey guys. I apologize this chapter took so long to come out. My life kind of spiraled for a bit. I'm back to living with my nan, and I had to change schools, not to mention high school is kicking me in the but. Summer was rough, my computer is kind of messed up, so a lot has been going on. I'll try to update more, but I can't make any promises. Speaking of, I've been re-working new ides for the future of this story so I need to plan that all out. Keep looking out for that!**

 **That's all for now. Tell me what you thought!**


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